Okay, some of you suggested I write some shorts to get my writing urge under control. I already know I'm not good at shorts, so I've decided that I'll just kind of use the blog to free write "back story" scenes for some of my projects.
Today, a piece from the world of Void:
(Also, there are "spoilers" if you care about that stuff.)
Adele hated keeping up appearances, but disobeying The Brotherhood was worse. Their punishments almost made The Tribune's wizarding world appealing. If it weren't for, you know, the corsets, old fashioned etiquette, and complete lack of technology. No, she would stay a Neophyte. She would continue to hide her abilities from normal humans. Voids, as some witches and wizards called them.
She held her seagull wings out wide to slow her flight. It wasn't her favorite bird form, but it blended the best so near the Pacific. Even now as she landed behind the small mechanic shop, Flip's, there were several seagull friends to greet her. They squawked at her presence, knowing she wasn't quite what she seemed.
Adele found a large truck to hide behind, and then she took her true form. Her strawberry blonde hair tickled her collarbones, so she pushed it back. It didn't feel strange to shift back to the seventeen-year-old girl she was anymore, but she would always remember the first time she accidentally transformed.
It was just after she turned fourteen (in front of her best friend, no less), when the world around her grew as she screamed not from pain, but from fear. She'd turned into a black cat, which, looking back, was wholly unoriginal. Her friend ran straight to the police...The Brotherhood found her first, taught her how to use her skills in Transformation, informed her all about the other world of wizarding that might come for her.
She headed towards the front door, not at all excited to get her car back from the mechanics. To her it was just a prop; she'd rather fly. The bell sounded as she came in, and a boy her age came out from the back.
He smiled wide, two perfect dimples framing a mouth full of gleaming white teeth. His eyes were so green she thought they might glow in the dark, and his tan made her look whiter than she was. Holy moley, he was gorgeous. Where was he last time she visited?
"Hey, how can I help you?" He wiped the grime off his hands with a towel and leaned on the counter.
"I'm here to pick up my car..." Adele glanced at the name on his uniform, using her best flirty smile as she stared into his eyes. "Luke."
He grabbed a binder and flipped it open, totally ignoring what she thought was an obvious cue. "Alrighty, and your name would be?"
"Adele McDonnel."
"Oh!" His eyes lit up with excitment. "The '69 Camaro. I've been drooling over that beauty all week."
"Well," Adele leaned forward, hoping he'd catch her cleavage. "I hope you didn't ruin my upholstery."
He laughed, but kept his eyes on the binder. What was his problem? Most guys were easy to break. "I'll bring it out back so you can check it out, okay?"
"Sure."
Luke left her without so much as a glance, but it only made Adele more determined to get his attention. There was just something...fascinating about him, even if he was Void.
She left the store and went back outside. Luke had pulled her electric blue Camaro out of the garage. She almost didn't want him to get out—he looked hotter than she did behind the wheel. But he hopped out and sauntered over.
"We replaced all the belts along with the bad carbuerator, since they were looking worn. Hope you don't mind."
"Not at all." She had to keep him there longer...what else was wrong with her car? "Oh, could you just check the lock on the trunk? Sometimes it sticks. It's really annoying."
"Sure thing." He pulled her keys out of his pocket and went over to the trunk. She followed.
Adele stifled her gasp when she saw it. A flick. Was she making it up? No. She knew that flick. Luke was like her, except she had no idea about him. He had to be approaching eighteen if not already—how had he escaped The Brotherhood and The Tribune so long? Perhaps his talents weren't as obvious as Transformation.
Luke popped the trunk open without a problem. He looked at the gears inside and then said, "Everything looks fine. Feel free to come back if it gives you trouble."
"I know what you are," Adele whispered in reply.
His eyes went wide. "Excuse me?"
"I saw what you did." She smiled, put her hand on his arm. "Neophyte."
He recoiled. "I don't know what you're talking about."
She laughed. He was a good liar, but not that good. She invented lying. "Look, I'm not going to out you or anything. I just want to know why we don't know about you if you're not living in the bubble."
"We?"
She shook her head. "Answer my question first."
He folded his arms like he might not tell her. She wasn't sure which was hotter—his dimpled smile or the smoldering glare he now wore. "My girlfriend...she's a Void outcast from the, uh, bubble, as you say."
Adele swore. Girlfriend, should have guessed. "I see."
"And who's this we?"
"It's not exactly public information." She pulled the pen out of her pocket and grabbed his hand.
"Hey!" He ripped it back.
She rolled her eyes. "I have some people to inform, and it might take a while to find them. I thought maybe you'd want my number just in case something happens in the meantime?"
He sighed, conjuring a small notepad so fast he had to be Telekinetic. She would have rather written on his hand, but she scribbled her cell number on the paper instead.
"That'll be $456.43," he said.
"Isn't that a bit pricey?"
Luke's glare sharpened. "Can't you afford it, Neophyte?"
She laughed. Man, he was so broody sexy. Forget the girlfriend, she would take Luke anyway. She held out her hand, looking over her shoulder to make sure the coast was clear. Then she whispered the spell and a stack of money materialized in her palm.
"That's double what I asked," Luke said.
Adele shrugged, shoving the money in his pocket. "You deserve a tip."
He stepped back, not saying anything when he tossed her the keys. She waved as she revved the engine and drove away.
Friday, July 31, 2009
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Cracking
It's been a month since I last wrote new material. Why does that feel like forever?
In that time I've edited my brains out on three projects. I really do enjoy editing. I love seeing how much my work improves. I love getting it "right." I even love using my red pen to slash out lines of redundancy. And I still have so much editing to do...
But it's draining. It takes a lot of brain power, and my reserves are running low! How do I usually boost my brain power? I write. And, well, I made this little goal not to write another book this year. Let's just say I'm sorely tempted to abandon that idea.
I know, a month and I'm already cracking. Pathetic. I'm about halfway through my ninja line edit, and I absolutely have to finish that first. And I really need to finish up my reworking of Hammered. Then...well, we'll see how long I last.
...And back to editing.
In that time I've edited my brains out on three projects. I really do enjoy editing. I love seeing how much my work improves. I love getting it "right." I even love using my red pen to slash out lines of redundancy. And I still have so much editing to do...
But it's draining. It takes a lot of brain power, and my reserves are running low! How do I usually boost my brain power? I write. And, well, I made this little goal not to write another book this year. Let's just say I'm sorely tempted to abandon that idea.
I know, a month and I'm already cracking. Pathetic. I'm about halfway through my ninja line edit, and I absolutely have to finish that first. And I really need to finish up my reworking of Hammered. Then...well, we'll see how long I last.
...And back to editing.
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Crit Groups and Bridging the Gap
Yesterday in comments, I was asked if all those revisions for Relax, I'm a Ninja came from my crit group. No, they didn't. There are some unique circumstances surrounding this project that I can't talk about, but I did want to talk about crit groups and what I've learned from them.
If you didn't know, Kiersten and Renee were the beginning of my crit group. We found each other around May 2008, and it was the first time I ever let "strangers" read my stuff. Kasie joined my crew after that, as did Sara. Those four gals I consider my "core" writing critters. I have others I go to, but not for every project. And, of course, I have reading critters too, but they're mostly for ego stroking. (I need a lot of ego stroking; I'm very fragile.)
I love my group, I really do. I wouldn't have grown so much or so quickly as a writer without them. There are things I never would have seen, things I never would have learned, if it weren't for them pointing it out.
And not only have a gained skill from working with a crit group, but very close friends. Kiersten, Renee, Kasie, and Sara have become some of the closest friends in my life. There's something about them reading my work that's brought me closer to them. They know me; they know how I write. For the most part, they like it. Writers get writers—I'm not sure other people really understand the certain brand of craziness we have.
If you don't have a crit group, I highly recommend finding one. They are indespensible now that revising has become largely the responsibility of the writer. The business is in bad shape, if you didn't know, and publishers are looking for books they don't have to waste resources on. Editing would be one of those resources.
That said, I need to warn you that there is still a gap, so to speak, between what a crit group can offer and where you might need to be to get an agent's attention. Just because you've had your stuff critiqued doesn't mean it's ready, sadly.
My group was made up of new, unagented, unpublished writers just starting on the journey. As much as we helped each other, I don't think any of us were aware of how much more we should be helping. We just didn't have the skills or knowledge yet, but we did the best with what we had.
And then we all jumped into The Query Wars. Some of us learned that even though we'd done our best work, it wasn't enough. Kiersten snagged an agent, since she was definitely the most ready. We all got feedback in varying degrees, and we were able to figure out what was expected of a writer. Then we got back to work.
With each book, my abilities grew leaps and bounds, but I kept getting one major comment from agents: great premise/idea, but my prose wasn't polished enough. I had NO CLUE what that meant. I'd gotten it several times, but none of us could really decode what they wanted me to do. I edited and edited. Still the same thing.
It was as if there was this gorge between me and my goal. I didn't feel like I'd ever get across this mystery called polished prose. Even with my crit group. But then I got lucky and had an agent tell me precisely what was meant by polished prose. I finally could fix it and pass the knowledge to my group.
So know the "level" of your crit group. It's okay to be green as long as you're willing to learn. We've all benefitted by getting a little attention from those with more experience. You might need a stack of rejections before you really get it. I know I did.
Usually, you end up with people who are about the same as you, which is a good thing because you grow together. Kiersten and Kasie now have agents, Sara and I have been in revisions with agents, and Renee's new book WILL get attention when she finishes revising. (C'mon, Ren!) It's very rewarding to see your crit partners succeed, because you had an itty bitty hand in it.
Just be aware that crits don't automatically equal publishable. Sometimes there is still growing to be had, and that's okay. It will come if you keep working.
If you didn't know, Kiersten and Renee were the beginning of my crit group. We found each other around May 2008, and it was the first time I ever let "strangers" read my stuff. Kasie joined my crew after that, as did Sara. Those four gals I consider my "core" writing critters. I have others I go to, but not for every project. And, of course, I have reading critters too, but they're mostly for ego stroking. (I need a lot of ego stroking; I'm very fragile.)
I love my group, I really do. I wouldn't have grown so much or so quickly as a writer without them. There are things I never would have seen, things I never would have learned, if it weren't for them pointing it out.
And not only have a gained skill from working with a crit group, but very close friends. Kiersten, Renee, Kasie, and Sara have become some of the closest friends in my life. There's something about them reading my work that's brought me closer to them. They know me; they know how I write. For the most part, they like it. Writers get writers—I'm not sure other people really understand the certain brand of craziness we have.
If you don't have a crit group, I highly recommend finding one. They are indespensible now that revising has become largely the responsibility of the writer. The business is in bad shape, if you didn't know, and publishers are looking for books they don't have to waste resources on. Editing would be one of those resources.
That said, I need to warn you that there is still a gap, so to speak, between what a crit group can offer and where you might need to be to get an agent's attention. Just because you've had your stuff critiqued doesn't mean it's ready, sadly.
My group was made up of new, unagented, unpublished writers just starting on the journey. As much as we helped each other, I don't think any of us were aware of how much more we should be helping. We just didn't have the skills or knowledge yet, but we did the best with what we had.
And then we all jumped into The Query Wars. Some of us learned that even though we'd done our best work, it wasn't enough. Kiersten snagged an agent, since she was definitely the most ready. We all got feedback in varying degrees, and we were able to figure out what was expected of a writer. Then we got back to work.
With each book, my abilities grew leaps and bounds, but I kept getting one major comment from agents: great premise/idea, but my prose wasn't polished enough. I had NO CLUE what that meant. I'd gotten it several times, but none of us could really decode what they wanted me to do. I edited and edited. Still the same thing.
It was as if there was this gorge between me and my goal. I didn't feel like I'd ever get across this mystery called polished prose. Even with my crit group. But then I got lucky and had an agent tell me precisely what was meant by polished prose. I finally could fix it and pass the knowledge to my group.
So know the "level" of your crit group. It's okay to be green as long as you're willing to learn. We've all benefitted by getting a little attention from those with more experience. You might need a stack of rejections before you really get it. I know I did.
Usually, you end up with people who are about the same as you, which is a good thing because you grow together. Kiersten and Kasie now have agents, Sara and I have been in revisions with agents, and Renee's new book WILL get attention when she finishes revising. (C'mon, Ren!) It's very rewarding to see your crit partners succeed, because you had an itty bitty hand in it.
Just be aware that crits don't automatically equal publishable. Sometimes there is still growing to be had, and that's okay. It will come if you keep working.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Losing Words
If you write, you know how painful it can be to delete those words you worked so hard to put on the page. They're part of you, somehow, and cutting them is like slicing into your soul or some other painful comparison.
Well, it's time to get over that. (I must be in some fighting mood lately, sheesh.) Words are words. They have no more value than the idea they portray. And if a word (or thousands) don't help your story, then it's time to say goodbye. Whoa, don't swing that pitchfork at me!
I'm not heartless; I still cringe a little when I have to cut some of my absolute favorite stuff. But I've learned something:
When you have the courage to cut what you have, it gives you the ability to write something better.
Some of my best stuff has come after serious trimming. And I look at my story in awe. It may have hurt, but the revisions make it incredible. Not just good enough. Not just cool. But actually pretty dang awesome, at least for my skill level. Hate to say it, but pruning promotes growth, and you're short changing your own growth if you hang on to your words like each one is gilded in gold.
I know not everyone out there is aware of just how much you can revise a book. Before my current situation, I sure know I wasn't. I thought cleaning up the prose was all you could do without "breaking" the book. Oh, how wrong I was. With this in mind, I'm going to be super open and give you a vague list of the revisions I did on Relax, I'm a Ninja. These will be the major revisions, not read throughs for typos, etc.
Major Revision #1:
• Cut 3 chapters
• Cut 10k words
• Smoothed out story based on cuts
• Removed a lot of repetition
• Added two scenes in order to "show not tell"
• Changed a scene that rehashed old information
• Rewrote the final battle
• Paper line edit
I did the best possible job I knew how. It was the best revising I'd ever done! Honestly, I was proud of how much I improved the story. I'd already become a convert to the power of having an open mind and no compassion for my words.
Final Verdict: The revisions were great, but I didn't do enough. The back half of the book had major structural flaws. The book needed a lot more work.
Bummer. But once I saw how great the story could be if I was willing to work, I couldn't just give up. Sure, it was daunting, but I dove in.
Major Revision #2:
• Cut one of my favorite characters
• Cut 6 minor characters that got in the way
• Removed a 30 page section of the book and replaced it with something totally different (Actually, this is now one of my favorite parts in the entire book.)
• Edited the last third of the book based on the 30-page change
• Changed the final villain
• Added a "red herring"
• Changed location of final chapter
• Added more tension in the relationship factor
By the time I was finished, I was shocked at how much my book had changed. And yet the actual story hadn't changed at all. It was only clearer, stronger, and more action-packed.
Final Verdict: Great, but not enough. I missed the mark on the emotional arcs, which didn't match up well with the final, action-based climax. Too much was already resolved before the ending. There were still a few scenes that seemed repetitive leading up to the climax.
Major Revision #3:
• Added a crucial scene to push the emotional stress over-the-top. (Also now one of my absolute favorite scenes in the book.)
• Added "the aftermath" of that crucial scene.
• Changed how a character reacted to certain information
• Changed how a character felt about a certain person
• Cut the chapter leading up to the climax, since it was actually pretty illogical and redundant.
• Changed the build up to the final reveal.
• Added a scene to the denouement.
• Moved a scene to the final chapter, instead of second-to-last.
• Read entire book out loud for errors
Seriously, after this revision I couldn't see how there would be more to fix. At least on a structural level. For the most part, I felt like I was getting really close to "done."
Final Verdict: Almost! Just a few more things to clear up.
Major Revision #4 (current):
• Added more tension to friendships
• Cut a scene I loved, but ultimately dragged.
• Put the crucial elements of that scene in appropriate places
• Changed a fight in one chapter (which is so awesome I get giddy thinking about it)
• Added more tension to first chapter
• Shaved off a bunch in chapter 4
• Cut a piece of chapter 8
• Now doing another paper line edit with goal for another 5k cut this round
Looking at that list, I'm not quite sure how I did it. It's been a very long, educational process though. I would not have traded it for the world. And one of the major things I've learned is that losing words is not as devastating as it feels at first. The scenes I wrote to replace those words are a bajillion times better than what was there before. I'm so glad I had the courage to change it—I would have missed out on some of my favorite scenes otherwise.
Since I will be line editing this week, I'll be laying low. Don't worry, I'll be checking in on all your blogs and such, just maybe not commenting. I may even, gasp, miss posting a couple days.
Well, it's time to get over that. (I must be in some fighting mood lately, sheesh.) Words are words. They have no more value than the idea they portray. And if a word (or thousands) don't help your story, then it's time to say goodbye. Whoa, don't swing that pitchfork at me!
I'm not heartless; I still cringe a little when I have to cut some of my absolute favorite stuff. But I've learned something:
When you have the courage to cut what you have, it gives you the ability to write something better.
Some of my best stuff has come after serious trimming. And I look at my story in awe. It may have hurt, but the revisions make it incredible. Not just good enough. Not just cool. But actually pretty dang awesome, at least for my skill level. Hate to say it, but pruning promotes growth, and you're short changing your own growth if you hang on to your words like each one is gilded in gold.
I know not everyone out there is aware of just how much you can revise a book. Before my current situation, I sure know I wasn't. I thought cleaning up the prose was all you could do without "breaking" the book. Oh, how wrong I was. With this in mind, I'm going to be super open and give you a vague list of the revisions I did on Relax, I'm a Ninja. These will be the major revisions, not read throughs for typos, etc.
Major Revision #1:
• Cut 3 chapters
• Cut 10k words
• Smoothed out story based on cuts
• Removed a lot of repetition
• Added two scenes in order to "show not tell"
• Changed a scene that rehashed old information
• Rewrote the final battle
• Paper line edit
I did the best possible job I knew how. It was the best revising I'd ever done! Honestly, I was proud of how much I improved the story. I'd already become a convert to the power of having an open mind and no compassion for my words.
Final Verdict: The revisions were great, but I didn't do enough. The back half of the book had major structural flaws. The book needed a lot more work.
Bummer. But once I saw how great the story could be if I was willing to work, I couldn't just give up. Sure, it was daunting, but I dove in.
Major Revision #2:
• Cut one of my favorite characters
• Cut 6 minor characters that got in the way
• Removed a 30 page section of the book and replaced it with something totally different (Actually, this is now one of my favorite parts in the entire book.)
• Edited the last third of the book based on the 30-page change
• Changed the final villain
• Added a "red herring"
• Changed location of final chapter
• Added more tension in the relationship factor
By the time I was finished, I was shocked at how much my book had changed. And yet the actual story hadn't changed at all. It was only clearer, stronger, and more action-packed.
Final Verdict: Great, but not enough. I missed the mark on the emotional arcs, which didn't match up well with the final, action-based climax. Too much was already resolved before the ending. There were still a few scenes that seemed repetitive leading up to the climax.
Major Revision #3:
• Added a crucial scene to push the emotional stress over-the-top. (Also now one of my absolute favorite scenes in the book.)
• Added "the aftermath" of that crucial scene.
• Changed how a character reacted to certain information
• Changed how a character felt about a certain person
• Cut the chapter leading up to the climax, since it was actually pretty illogical and redundant.
• Changed the build up to the final reveal.
• Added a scene to the denouement.
• Moved a scene to the final chapter, instead of second-to-last.
• Read entire book out loud for errors
Seriously, after this revision I couldn't see how there would be more to fix. At least on a structural level. For the most part, I felt like I was getting really close to "done."
Final Verdict: Almost! Just a few more things to clear up.
Major Revision #4 (current):
• Added more tension to friendships
• Cut a scene I loved, but ultimately dragged.
• Put the crucial elements of that scene in appropriate places
• Changed a fight in one chapter (which is so awesome I get giddy thinking about it)
• Added more tension to first chapter
• Shaved off a bunch in chapter 4
• Cut a piece of chapter 8
• Now doing another paper line edit with goal for another 5k cut this round
Looking at that list, I'm not quite sure how I did it. It's been a very long, educational process though. I would not have traded it for the world. And one of the major things I've learned is that losing words is not as devastating as it feels at first. The scenes I wrote to replace those words are a bajillion times better than what was there before. I'm so glad I had the courage to change it—I would have missed out on some of my favorite scenes otherwise.
Since I will be line editing this week, I'll be laying low. Don't worry, I'll be checking in on all your blogs and such, just maybe not commenting. I may even, gasp, miss posting a couple days.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Suspense
There are two kinds of suspense, one of which I, personally, despise. Let's see if you can guess which one: 1) Suspense generated from what's actually happening in the story. 2) Suspense generated from how the writer writes that story.
Have you picked yet?
Are you sure about that answer?
Do you want me to tell you which one I hate?
I probably will...eventually, but first I want to tell you about the two cats I had growing up. They were orange tabbies from the same litter, both boys. We named them Calvin and Hobbes. Awesome, right? Man, they were so cute. Hobbes was my favorite; he'd cuddle up on my shoulder as a kitten. Sweet little thing. Those were good times.
What was I talking about? Oh yeah, suspense. Before I tell you which one I hate, I think I should explain more what I mean about the two kinds. Maybe you didn't get it up there.
So suspense that comes from what is happening in the story centers around character and plot conflict. Books have to have conflict—that's what makes them interesting. And if you resolve one conflict, another has to immediately crop up or the book must end. The suspense comes from wondering if these conflicts will be resolved.
Will Frodo destroy the ring?
Will Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy ever get together?
Will insert-hot-blonde survive the zombie apocalypse?
Not only is story suspense generated by these big, burning questions, but by the smaller things along the way—the ones that get in the way of the big goal.
Will Boromir take the ring from Frodo? Will Golem sabotage the mission? Will the Ring Wraiths find Frodo?
Will Elizabeth ever get over her prejudice? Will Darcy get over his pride? Will his Aunt make problems? Can they get past their crazy families?
Will hot blonde know how to use that cleaver? Will she run fast enough when she's been starving herself to stay super hot? Will a zombie fall in love with her and stay his oozing hand?
Suspense, in a story, is obviously a vital thing. Now let's move on to suspense the writer creates through the writing...
Wait, one more story about my cats. So the first Christmas we had Calvin and Hobbes, they climbed up into our Christmas tree and we couldn't get them out forever. Oh man, it was so funny. You should have been there. We took pictures though, but I'm not going to call my mom and get them to post. That's more work than I care to put into this rant.
Also, I made some cinnamon struesl muffins this morning. Man, they're so good. I'm eating one right now with milk. Yummmm.
Writer generated suspense comes from how a writer chooses to draw out the conflict. Sometimes it can be as simple as a chapter cliffhanger. Other times it can be things like, uh, flashbacks, asides, pov shifts, and pausing to describe everything in a room.
Okay, I can't take it anymore...I think I've made my point by now:
I HATE writer generated suspense about 95% of the time. I know, I promise I know, that it can be effective in the right hands and in moderation. But here's why I hate it so much:
It's like the writer is saying, "Hey, so I'm going to deliberately torture you right now. Mostly because I don't trust that my story is suspenseful enough on its own, so I need to throw in a bunch of smoke and mirrors that I think will keep you reading."
Here's the thing—it STOPS me from reading because I get maddeningly frustrated. I know what the writer is doing, and I don't think it's clever or effective. I find it ANNOYING.
And what's worse is that 100% of the time the story IS suspenseful enough on its own. I want to keep reading about the characters, but am exhausted by the "fake" suspense the author throws in. I feel like they don't trust me to grasp how compelling their book is, so they use devices to try and trick me to keep reading. I don't need to be tricked—just give me a good story!
So here's a tip: You want suspense? Look at your character motivations, your plot, your stakes, and how they all come together. Don't throw in a monologue on modern dance right when I'm on the edge of my seat about whether or not your character will get picked for the Dance Company. I know what you're doing. I don't buy it. And I will put your book down.
Thus ends my Sunday rant...maybe I should make this a weekly thing. Totally cathartic.
Have you picked yet?
Are you sure about that answer?
Do you want me to tell you which one I hate?
I probably will...eventually, but first I want to tell you about the two cats I had growing up. They were orange tabbies from the same litter, both boys. We named them Calvin and Hobbes. Awesome, right? Man, they were so cute. Hobbes was my favorite; he'd cuddle up on my shoulder as a kitten. Sweet little thing. Those were good times.
What was I talking about? Oh yeah, suspense. Before I tell you which one I hate, I think I should explain more what I mean about the two kinds. Maybe you didn't get it up there.
So suspense that comes from what is happening in the story centers around character and plot conflict. Books have to have conflict—that's what makes them interesting. And if you resolve one conflict, another has to immediately crop up or the book must end. The suspense comes from wondering if these conflicts will be resolved.
Will Frodo destroy the ring?
Will Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy ever get together?
Will insert-hot-blonde survive the zombie apocalypse?
Not only is story suspense generated by these big, burning questions, but by the smaller things along the way—the ones that get in the way of the big goal.
Will Boromir take the ring from Frodo? Will Golem sabotage the mission? Will the Ring Wraiths find Frodo?
Will Elizabeth ever get over her prejudice? Will Darcy get over his pride? Will his Aunt make problems? Can they get past their crazy families?
Will hot blonde know how to use that cleaver? Will she run fast enough when she's been starving herself to stay super hot? Will a zombie fall in love with her and stay his oozing hand?
Suspense, in a story, is obviously a vital thing. Now let's move on to suspense the writer creates through the writing...
Wait, one more story about my cats. So the first Christmas we had Calvin and Hobbes, they climbed up into our Christmas tree and we couldn't get them out forever. Oh man, it was so funny. You should have been there. We took pictures though, but I'm not going to call my mom and get them to post. That's more work than I care to put into this rant.
Also, I made some cinnamon struesl muffins this morning. Man, they're so good. I'm eating one right now with milk. Yummmm.
Writer generated suspense comes from how a writer chooses to draw out the conflict. Sometimes it can be as simple as a chapter cliffhanger. Other times it can be things like, uh, flashbacks, asides, pov shifts, and pausing to describe everything in a room.
Okay, I can't take it anymore...I think I've made my point by now:
I HATE writer generated suspense about 95% of the time. I know, I promise I know, that it can be effective in the right hands and in moderation. But here's why I hate it so much:
It's like the writer is saying, "Hey, so I'm going to deliberately torture you right now. Mostly because I don't trust that my story is suspenseful enough on its own, so I need to throw in a bunch of smoke and mirrors that I think will keep you reading."
Here's the thing—it STOPS me from reading because I get maddeningly frustrated. I know what the writer is doing, and I don't think it's clever or effective. I find it ANNOYING.
And what's worse is that 100% of the time the story IS suspenseful enough on its own. I want to keep reading about the characters, but am exhausted by the "fake" suspense the author throws in. I feel like they don't trust me to grasp how compelling their book is, so they use devices to try and trick me to keep reading. I don't need to be tricked—just give me a good story!
So here's a tip: You want suspense? Look at your character motivations, your plot, your stakes, and how they all come together. Don't throw in a monologue on modern dance right when I'm on the edge of my seat about whether or not your character will get picked for the Dance Company. I know what you're doing. I don't buy it. And I will put your book down.
Thus ends my Sunday rant...maybe I should make this a weekly thing. Totally cathartic.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Saturday Sketch 5.1
Okay, one more retreat related item! I colored this pretty little elf last weekend while I was there. Bailey, Jenni's daughter, MADE me. I didn't really like this sketch, actually, but she said that's because it needed color. Well, that smart girl was right.
She's quite pretty, no? Bailey also said that I wasn't allowed to use green or purple, because I used those colors a lot in my drawings. That is also true. I love green and purple. So she became a fiery elf.
In other news, I printed off Relax, I'm a Ninja for a serious scrub down. All the bigger revisions are done, so now it's time to get really picky. I have a goal to cut 2,000 more words, which I will meet. And that would mean, in total, the ninjas will have lost 15k in this process. Sometimes that makes me cringe, but I know without a doubt it's for the better.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Leaving Just Stinks
I've made quite a bit of headway on edits, so I decided I'm going to get this last Writers' Retreat adventure written out. That way I can disappear into Tosh's world all tomorrow...well, at least when I'm not changing diapers and cooking meals.
So, final reminder: Points of Awesome (POAs) will be awarded at random and, really, you shouldn't feel bad if you lose because I probably just missed something awesome you did and it would actually all even out and now I'm trying to make this sentence way longer than necessary and I think I've almost succeeded...and now.
(Um, I feel like I should have some kind of warning that this post might be...weird. Like, weirder than normal.)
Sunday was kind of a sad day because I had to leave! By then I wanted to stay forever, but my family missed me and I felt a little bad about that. I mean, I can't deprive people of my coolness too long or they get really depressed. It's hard being so important, but I accepted that burden long ago.
Seriously though, it was so fun the Glam almost DITCHED ME to stay for another day. Jenn was going to give her a ride home. Honestly, I wouldn't have blamed her. But she decided I shouldn't drive alone with my Speed Limit Avenger Curse, so 5 pts to her for having my back. (Also, 10 pts to Jenn for being so sweet to offer her a ride home.)
Not much happened that day...at least not before I left. Stephanie, Kasie's sister, had a great heart-to-heart with me in the morning. Our kids are about the same age—she's just as adorable as Kasie. 15 pts for utter goodheartedness. We'll have to consult the other attendees for what I'm sure were good times that night. But there's one thing I have to mention right now, because it could very well save the teeth of every single person on this planet.
This is Jenni. Take a good look at her, because you'll want to steal her saliva next time you see her in person.
Right now you're going, "WHAT? Did Natalie just say I'd want to steal Jenni's SALIVA?" Yes, yes I did. Jenni has what they call super saliva—dead serious, her dentist has confirmed it. Apparently there are some people on this planet who have UBER antibodies in their spit—antibodies that prevent tartar and cavities!
I know! It's a super power!
Jenni has never had a cavity in her life, and when she waited years for a check-up she was sure she'd have at least one. Her dentist said she barely had tartar build up! He was astonished and did a saliva sample. Sure enough—super saliva.
"I've heard of you people before, studied them in school. But I've never met one," he said as he leaned in far too close. "You can pass that on, you know. If you share your spit."
Though thoroughly creeped out by her dentist, Jenni realized she did have some serious powers. Her husband hadn't had a cavity since they started dating—now she knew why. She immediately started using her spit for good, taking sips of her kids' drinks, etc. It's a shame it's not socially acceptable to share her gift further.
BUT. I got to use her chapstick! Neener neener neener! And I'm sooo making her spit in my soda next time I see her. I hate cavities and dentists that much. (50 pts to Jenni and her super saliva.)
Okay, moving on. Obviously I'm super fascinated with Jenni's spit. What else happened that day? I'm so distracted...oh yeah! Kasie stroked my ego!
Kasie acted like she was so sad that I was leaving early. Why? Because she wanted to hear more from my book, Hammered. How nice is that? But that's not the end of her niceness! She made me sit down and read her THREE chapters. Three! And she even listened the whole time and told me it was awesome and she's dying for the rest.
Man, I love Kasie. 40 pts for serious inflation of my ego.
Michelle (the Glam) took time to share with us this incredible character role analysis thingamajob. I'm not even going to try and explain the ice cream cone diagram, but you just have to talk about it in person. One thing: it's INCREDIBLE. Seriously, when she showed me this, it opened up a whole new realm of revising for me. 10 pts for adding some education to all our fun.
When Candice found out I had to leave early, she made sure everyone got on dinner asap so we could eat before we left. So sweet. They put up quite a feast for us—barbeque chicken, salad, left over gumbo, rolls. YUM. It was such a great way to finish off my time there, around the table chatting and enjoying new friendships. 30 pts to Candice for awesome dinner and farewell.
Before we left, we had to take pictures! So we lined up and posed our brains out.
Aren't we cute?
And this is all of us, non-writers included, looking all gorgeous and stuff.
After some speedy driving, a few pitstops, and some great conversation, Michelle and I made it home in one piece. It's taken me the whole week so far to feel like I've caught up on sleep, but it was so worth it. I miss you so gals! See you next year, or hopefully sooner.
Now, what you've all been waiting for:
POA FINAL TOTAL
Natalie: 65
Michelle: 95
Candice: 90
Jenni: 95
Kasie: 80
Jenn: 70
Reed's Drive-In: 50
MeganRebekah: 15
Aquatic Rebels: 50
Bailey: 10
Casey: 10
Stephanie: 15
Slumber Party Girls: 50
We have a tie! Go Michelle and Jenni! You guys WIN. No, not a prize. You just WIN. Isn't that enough these days? Well, it better be. I ain't got nothing for you.
So, final reminder: Points of Awesome (POAs) will be awarded at random and, really, you shouldn't feel bad if you lose because I probably just missed something awesome you did and it would actually all even out and now I'm trying to make this sentence way longer than necessary and I think I've almost succeeded...and now.
(Um, I feel like I should have some kind of warning that this post might be...weird. Like, weirder than normal.)
Sunday was kind of a sad day because I had to leave! By then I wanted to stay forever, but my family missed me and I felt a little bad about that. I mean, I can't deprive people of my coolness too long or they get really depressed. It's hard being so important, but I accepted that burden long ago.
Seriously though, it was so fun the Glam almost DITCHED ME to stay for another day. Jenn was going to give her a ride home. Honestly, I wouldn't have blamed her. But she decided I shouldn't drive alone with my Speed Limit Avenger Curse, so 5 pts to her for having my back. (Also, 10 pts to Jenn for being so sweet to offer her a ride home.)
Not much happened that day...at least not before I left. Stephanie, Kasie's sister, had a great heart-to-heart with me in the morning. Our kids are about the same age—she's just as adorable as Kasie. 15 pts for utter goodheartedness. We'll have to consult the other attendees for what I'm sure were good times that night. But there's one thing I have to mention right now, because it could very well save the teeth of every single person on this planet.
This is Jenni. Take a good look at her, because you'll want to steal her saliva next time you see her in person.
Right now you're going, "WHAT? Did Natalie just say I'd want to steal Jenni's SALIVA?" Yes, yes I did. Jenni has what they call super saliva—dead serious, her dentist has confirmed it. Apparently there are some people on this planet who have UBER antibodies in their spit—antibodies that prevent tartar and cavities!I know! It's a super power!
Jenni has never had a cavity in her life, and when she waited years for a check-up she was sure she'd have at least one. Her dentist said she barely had tartar build up! He was astonished and did a saliva sample. Sure enough—super saliva.
"I've heard of you people before, studied them in school. But I've never met one," he said as he leaned in far too close. "You can pass that on, you know. If you share your spit."
Though thoroughly creeped out by her dentist, Jenni realized she did have some serious powers. Her husband hadn't had a cavity since they started dating—now she knew why. She immediately started using her spit for good, taking sips of her kids' drinks, etc. It's a shame it's not socially acceptable to share her gift further.
BUT. I got to use her chapstick! Neener neener neener! And I'm sooo making her spit in my soda next time I see her. I hate cavities and dentists that much. (50 pts to Jenni and her super saliva.)
Okay, moving on. Obviously I'm super fascinated with Jenni's spit. What else happened that day? I'm so distracted...oh yeah! Kasie stroked my ego!
Kasie acted like she was so sad that I was leaving early. Why? Because she wanted to hear more from my book, Hammered. How nice is that? But that's not the end of her niceness! She made me sit down and read her THREE chapters. Three! And she even listened the whole time and told me it was awesome and she's dying for the rest.
Man, I love Kasie. 40 pts for serious inflation of my ego.
Michelle (the Glam) took time to share with us this incredible character role analysis thingamajob. I'm not even going to try and explain the ice cream cone diagram, but you just have to talk about it in person. One thing: it's INCREDIBLE. Seriously, when she showed me this, it opened up a whole new realm of revising for me. 10 pts for adding some education to all our fun.
When Candice found out I had to leave early, she made sure everyone got on dinner asap so we could eat before we left. So sweet. They put up quite a feast for us—barbeque chicken, salad, left over gumbo, rolls. YUM. It was such a great way to finish off my time there, around the table chatting and enjoying new friendships. 30 pts to Candice for awesome dinner and farewell.
Before we left, we had to take pictures! So we lined up and posed our brains out.
Aren't we cute?
And this is all of us, non-writers included, looking all gorgeous and stuff.After some speedy driving, a few pitstops, and some great conversation, Michelle and I made it home in one piece. It's taken me the whole week so far to feel like I've caught up on sleep, but it was so worth it. I miss you so gals! See you next year, or hopefully sooner.
Now, what you've all been waiting for:
POA FINAL TOTAL
Natalie: 65
Michelle: 95
Candice: 90
Jenni: 95
Kasie: 80
Jenn: 70
Reed's Drive-In: 50
MeganRebekah: 15
Aquatic Rebels: 50
Bailey: 10
Casey: 10
Stephanie: 15
Slumber Party Girls: 50
We have a tie! Go Michelle and Jenni! You guys WIN. No, not a prize. You just WIN. Isn't that enough these days? Well, it better be. I ain't got nothing for you.
Intermission
Hey! So I'm not quite done with my recounting of the most Fantastic Writers' Retreat ever, but unfortunately I have to take a little break today. Don't worry, the last leg of my journey, plus the gripping competition for Points of Awesome (POAs), will continue tomorrow.
Why am I stopping mid-adventure? Well, if you have to know, I'm editing Relax, I'm a Ninja yet again! Actually, I'm SUPER pumped about it. Like, I can't even tell you. I think the book might actually reach a state of done-ness very, very soon. That's exciting—wear-all-orange-and-finally-go-see-Harry-Potter EXCITING. (Hmm, I just realized I'm severely lacking in orange purses...I may have to remedy that as well.)
I know some of you might be sad that you're not getting a good laugh at my dorkish awesomeness today, but never fear, Kiersten did a HILARIOUS post on a fake slumber party I teased her about on Twitter. I even make a surprise appearance in my orange shorts. So there you go. Enjoy. (Also, 50 pts to Slumber Party attendees.)
Why am I stopping mid-adventure? Well, if you have to know, I'm editing Relax, I'm a Ninja yet again! Actually, I'm SUPER pumped about it. Like, I can't even tell you. I think the book might actually reach a state of done-ness very, very soon. That's exciting—wear-all-orange-and-finally-go-see-Harry-Potter EXCITING. (Hmm, I just realized I'm severely lacking in orange purses...I may have to remedy that as well.)
I know some of you might be sad that you're not getting a good laugh at my dorkish awesomeness today, but never fear, Kiersten did a HILARIOUS post on a fake slumber party I teased her about on Twitter. I even make a surprise appearance in my orange shorts. So there you go. Enjoy. (Also, 50 pts to Slumber Party attendees.)
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Writing, Games, and Fish
This is the 3rd installment of tales from the Writers' Retreat. Go here or here for previous posts. Reminder: Points of Awesome (POA) will be given to whoever (and whatever) I deem awesome. Writer with most POAs wins.
When I woke up on Saturday, I still wasn't feeling 100%. I packed myself with more vitamin C and decided resting/writing would be a better idea than going to the waterfall with everyone. Apparently I missed out, but I take my health pretty seriously. I hate being sick longer than I have to.
Michelle decided to stay with me, since she was kind of in her own serious writing groove. So nice, huh? I didn't do a little highlight on the Glam yesterday, so let me just take a moment now.
Why I like Michelle:
• She thinks I'm way smarter than I am.
• She laughs at all my jokes.
• She's a Deep Thinker.
• We have the same taste in a freaky amount of things. (5 pts to Michelle for loving cheese like I do.)
• She photoshops all the zits off my face to make me look like a model.
• Oh yeah, and she's one of my best friends.
So Candi, Kasie, Jenni, Jenn, and the rest of the crew went off to some really awesome waterfall/lake thing while the Glam and I got down to business. Yes, we wrote actual words while at the retreat. I'm not sure if the others can say that. (10 pts to Natalie and Michelle for being productive.)
I started on my revisions of Hammered, my book about a future America split down the middle by a war between cyborgs and clones. It's pretty freaking awesome, but I really messed up the back half. I'd hit a wall about half way into my revising, and Michelle and I had an awesome talk about what I was trying to do and how I could keep up the tension. I had a MAJOR breakthrough. Like, major. It's sooo much better this way, so I don't care if I missed out on swimming. (5 pts to me for figuring out my book.)
Michelle was a little writing fiend that weekend too. She busted out the words! Like, more words than she usually writes in a week. So kudos and 5 pts to Michelle for extreme productivity.
When everyone got back, we were bombarded with strange tales from the lake. I don't have any pictures, so I'm not sure if any of their tales are true. But let me summarize and share a disturbing theory:
1. Jenni met this adorable 15-year-old boy (not in a creepy way, she swears) who she's going to put in her next book. He's perfect for it! Totally adorable with the greenest eyes on the planet, apparently. (10 pts to Jenni for partially stalking a kid for writing purposes.)
2. Jenn kept feeling a strange tugging on her swimsuit skirt. Once she felt the slimy offender, she realized they were sucker fish assaulting her! I probably would have gotten out of the water at that point, but Jenn seemed no worse for the wear. (10 pts for courage in the face of sucker fish.)
3. Jenni's daughter Bailey was minding her own business, just enjoying the water like all the other visitors at the falls. Then a rather large fish springs from the water, comes right at her, and slaps her across the face! She reports that it kinda hurt. (10 pts to Bailey for not letting the fish get the best of her.)
4. Jenni's sister Casey, while cleaning up from the waterfall adventure, discovers a dead fish in her bathing suit. Screaming ensues, along with intense shuddering. (10 pts to Casey just because that's pretty freaking gross.)
Are you seeing a trend here? There sure seemed to be a lot of fish related incidents. Were the fish trying to tell them something? I tried to think like a fish—how would I feel with about all these humans in my lake? And then it hit:
They had to be part of the Aquatic Rebels, a gang of fish dedicated to liberating the Earth's waters of smelly humankind. This was a warning. I'm not sure what measures they'll take for liberty next. Also, 50 pts to the Aquatic Rebels, for safety purposes. (What? You think I've been researching too much on Revolutions? ...maybe.)
Mmm, Gumbo. Okay, can't take it—10 more pts to Jenn for the Gumbo. I'm drooling right now.
After dinner, we planned to play some writing games. If you didn't know, I'm a little competitive. I'm not proud of it; I can be a sore loser. I usually don't play if I know I'm going to get mean. That said, I had to give myself an edge, so I ran upstairs to get my lucky pants:
Yup, those would be my lucky pants. Though I guess they're more like lucky shorts. I mean, they're the best color ever created AND they're comfortable. Notice I'm also chugging Code Red—gotta get my head in the game, ya know? (10 pts to Natalie for looking ridiculously HAWT.)
So the writing games began with a speed challenge—20 mins, three words prompts, write as much as you can. I posted my results on Sunday. Not bad, though dismally low on word count (about 376). Michelle pumped it out and got over 600! (5 pts to Michelle for most words.) I was a little disappointed in how picky I got, but I do like what I wrote. It's so weird.
We also wrote a poem together, each person writing a little piece without knowing what the person before wrote. Here's what we ended up with:
I'm almost positive you can guess which part I wrote. There was some discussion that I'd ruined the poem. I'm thinking more like I made the poem awesome. (5 pts to Natalie for ruining/making the poem awesome.)
Once the games were over we read more from our projects. We did our favorite action scenes and our favorite kissy scenes. Kasie wanted to read something for the fourth book in her series, and she wanted to replace a character name so it wouldn't give anything away. Like I was going to accept that! I leaned over, trying to see, and giggles errupted as she and I fought over the screen. Turns out I didn't have to see, because she slipped up about half way through the scene. (20 pts to Kasie for her attempts to twart a ninja.)
Don't worry, we didn't fight too long. We'll always find kinship in our awesome Macbooks.
Once we got tired of reading, we turned to chatting late into the night. Can I just say that I love these gals? We talked about so many different things. At one point we talked about the themes in Michelle's The Breakaway, and I shared some of my experiences being in an emotionally abusive relationship back in the day. Candice gave me such comforting words, and for that she gets 30 pts. I felt like I was with sisters, friends I'd known forever. So thank you all for taking care of me.
I crawled into bed around two, and thus ends day two...
POA TOTAL:
Natalie: 65
Michelle: 80
Candice: 60
Jenni: 45
Kasie: 40
Jenn: 60
Reed's Drive-In: 50
MeganRebekah: 15
Aquatic Rebels: 50
Bailey: 10
Casey: 10
When I woke up on Saturday, I still wasn't feeling 100%. I packed myself with more vitamin C and decided resting/writing would be a better idea than going to the waterfall with everyone. Apparently I missed out, but I take my health pretty seriously. I hate being sick longer than I have to.
Michelle decided to stay with me, since she was kind of in her own serious writing groove. So nice, huh? I didn't do a little highlight on the Glam yesterday, so let me just take a moment now.
Why I like Michelle:• She thinks I'm way smarter than I am.
• She laughs at all my jokes.
• She's a Deep Thinker.
• We have the same taste in a freaky amount of things. (5 pts to Michelle for loving cheese like I do.)
• She photoshops all the zits off my face to make me look like a model.
• Oh yeah, and she's one of my best friends.
So Candi, Kasie, Jenni, Jenn, and the rest of the crew went off to some really awesome waterfall/lake thing while the Glam and I got down to business. Yes, we wrote actual words while at the retreat. I'm not sure if the others can say that. (10 pts to Natalie and Michelle for being productive.)
I started on my revisions of Hammered, my book about a future America split down the middle by a war between cyborgs and clones. It's pretty freaking awesome, but I really messed up the back half. I'd hit a wall about half way into my revising, and Michelle and I had an awesome talk about what I was trying to do and how I could keep up the tension. I had a MAJOR breakthrough. Like, major. It's sooo much better this way, so I don't care if I missed out on swimming. (5 pts to me for figuring out my book.)
Michelle was a little writing fiend that weekend too. She busted out the words! Like, more words than she usually writes in a week. So kudos and 5 pts to Michelle for extreme productivity.
When everyone got back, we were bombarded with strange tales from the lake. I don't have any pictures, so I'm not sure if any of their tales are true. But let me summarize and share a disturbing theory:
1. Jenni met this adorable 15-year-old boy (not in a creepy way, she swears) who she's going to put in her next book. He's perfect for it! Totally adorable with the greenest eyes on the planet, apparently. (10 pts to Jenni for partially stalking a kid for writing purposes.)
2. Jenn kept feeling a strange tugging on her swimsuit skirt. Once she felt the slimy offender, she realized they were sucker fish assaulting her! I probably would have gotten out of the water at that point, but Jenn seemed no worse for the wear. (10 pts for courage in the face of sucker fish.)
3. Jenni's daughter Bailey was minding her own business, just enjoying the water like all the other visitors at the falls. Then a rather large fish springs from the water, comes right at her, and slaps her across the face! She reports that it kinda hurt. (10 pts to Bailey for not letting the fish get the best of her.)
4. Jenni's sister Casey, while cleaning up from the waterfall adventure, discovers a dead fish in her bathing suit. Screaming ensues, along with intense shuddering. (10 pts to Casey just because that's pretty freaking gross.)
Are you seeing a trend here? There sure seemed to be a lot of fish related incidents. Were the fish trying to tell them something? I tried to think like a fish—how would I feel with about all these humans in my lake? And then it hit:
They had to be part of the Aquatic Rebels, a gang of fish dedicated to liberating the Earth's waters of smelly humankind. This was a warning. I'm not sure what measures they'll take for liberty next. Also, 50 pts to the Aquatic Rebels, for safety purposes. (What? You think I've been researching too much on Revolutions? ...maybe.)
"I'm making Gumbo," Jenn annouced, which immediately brought me out of the visions of Flipper in cammo. Dead serious, Michelle and I audibly gasped with glee. GUMBO. I love Gumbo. (20 pts to Jenn for making some rocking good Gumbo.) I mean, look how happy it made me:
That's Kasie, me, Jenn, and Jenni around the table enjoying the yummy Gumbo. (If you don't know what Gumbo is, it's spiced up rice, sausage, shrimp, and veggies all mixed together in perfect harmony.)
That's Kasie, me, Jenn, and Jenni around the table enjoying the yummy Gumbo. (If you don't know what Gumbo is, it's spiced up rice, sausage, shrimp, and veggies all mixed together in perfect harmony.)
Mmm, Gumbo. Okay, can't take it—10 more pts to Jenn for the Gumbo. I'm drooling right now.After dinner, we planned to play some writing games. If you didn't know, I'm a little competitive. I'm not proud of it; I can be a sore loser. I usually don't play if I know I'm going to get mean. That said, I had to give myself an edge, so I ran upstairs to get my lucky pants:
Yup, those would be my lucky pants. Though I guess they're more like lucky shorts. I mean, they're the best color ever created AND they're comfortable. Notice I'm also chugging Code Red—gotta get my head in the game, ya know? (10 pts to Natalie for looking ridiculously HAWT.)So the writing games began with a speed challenge—20 mins, three words prompts, write as much as you can. I posted my results on Sunday. Not bad, though dismally low on word count (about 376). Michelle pumped it out and got over 600! (5 pts to Michelle for most words.) I was a little disappointed in how picky I got, but I do like what I wrote. It's so weird.
We also wrote a poem together, each person writing a little piece without knowing what the person before wrote. Here's what we ended up with:
Last night I brushed the blossoms off my car,
This morning I told my little love
of all the things I like most about
sporks, it's the way two halves make a whole
And when tomorrow comes no mournful eye
shall greet the shadows of the evening
And the valley will deepen till the end.
This morning I told my little love
of all the things I like most about
sporks, it's the way two halves make a whole
And when tomorrow comes no mournful eye
shall greet the shadows of the evening
And the valley will deepen till the end.
I'm almost positive you can guess which part I wrote. There was some discussion that I'd ruined the poem. I'm thinking more like I made the poem awesome. (5 pts to Natalie for ruining/making the poem awesome.)
Once the games were over we read more from our projects. We did our favorite action scenes and our favorite kissy scenes. Kasie wanted to read something for the fourth book in her series, and she wanted to replace a character name so it wouldn't give anything away. Like I was going to accept that! I leaned over, trying to see, and giggles errupted as she and I fought over the screen. Turns out I didn't have to see, because she slipped up about half way through the scene. (20 pts to Kasie for her attempts to twart a ninja.)
Don't worry, we didn't fight too long. We'll always find kinship in our awesome Macbooks.Once we got tired of reading, we turned to chatting late into the night. Can I just say that I love these gals? We talked about so many different things. At one point we talked about the themes in Michelle's The Breakaway, and I shared some of my experiences being in an emotionally abusive relationship back in the day. Candice gave me such comforting words, and for that she gets 30 pts. I felt like I was with sisters, friends I'd known forever. So thank you all for taking care of me.
I crawled into bed around two, and thus ends day two...
POA TOTAL:
Natalie: 65
Michelle: 80
Candice: 60
Jenni: 45
Kasie: 40
Jenn: 60
Reed's Drive-In: 50
MeganRebekah: 15
Aquatic Rebels: 50
Bailey: 10
Casey: 10
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Friends Old and New
If you'd like to read part one of our little writers' retreat, see "The Drive Down." Reminder: Points of Awesome (POA) will be awarded on a completely arbitrary, if not illogical, basis. Writer with most POAs by the end of trip wins.
Once me and the Glam made it to this seriously cool cabin, we knew we were in for a good time. I mean, sure, we were in the Middle of Nowhere, Utah, but check out this nowhere:
The place was decked out! (har har, I'm a dork.) Not only a great view, but I even got my own room. Kitchen, spacious living room, and several bathrooms made it feel like home.
Candice's family has owned this cabin for a long time, and they hold family reunions there every year. She and her parents were nice enough to stay a little longer to host our retreat. (20pts to Candice for giving us the hook up.)
When Michelle and I arrived, only Candice and Jenni were there. But that worked out great because I hadn't officially met either of them. Jenni also brought her adorable daughter Bailey and her younger sister Casey. We had several hours to chat before Kasie and Jenn arrived. And chat we did—like teen girls discussing which Jonas Brother they like best, except about books and writing. (Okay, maybe there were a few mentions of Miley Cyrus, Disney princesses, and Zac Effron. But I swear I never heard a thing about a Jonas Brother.)
Here's what I learned about Candice:
• She has the most gorgeous smile.
• She treats everyone like family; I felt so welcome, like I'd known her a long time and hadn't just met.
• She and Michelle totally "get" each other's writing style.
• She has incredible taste in beverages—she tried my beloved Diet Mountain Dew Code Red and liked it. (10 pts to Candice for knowing where it's at.)
Here's what I learned about Jenni:
• She has a great sense of humor.
• Her husband and six children have red hair! So JEALOUS. (10 pts to Jenni for making so many babies with the coolest hair color in the world.)
• She is so chill about publishing—really believes it will happen when it happens. She treasures each moment of the journey.
• She's directed plays. Professionally.
Jenni was in charge of dinner that night, and she made a tater tot casserole. If you don't know what this is, you really need to. It's pretty much the epitome of Mormon comfort food. You take chicken and broccoli (or whatever veggies you like), mix em up with spices and cream of chicken soup, add LOTS of cheese, and put a layer of tater tots on top. What comes out of the oven is one glorious sheet of cheesy, potatoey goodness. (10 pts to Jenni for making broccoli too good to be healthy.)
And then the party really got going, because Kasie and Jenn showed up. Kasie brought along her daughter Hannah and her sister Stephanie as well. There was a lot of laughing after that as we ate food and got them settled.
Here's what you have to know about Kasie:
• She has seemingly endless energy.
• She's really good at playing the life of the party.
• She's pretty much gorgeous.
• She uses her computer so much that she just got the keyboard replaced—and freaked out becuase the store had her baby for THREE DAYS. (10 pts to Kasie for being as obsessive as me about my computer.)
Here's what I learned about Jenn:
• She has for real red, gorgeously curly hair that makes me simmer with envy.
• She's writing a boy MC like me! (10 pts for writing awesome boys!)
• She lives near me and the Glam—freaking small world.
• She also has excellent taste in beverages. Code Red for the win! (5 pts for good taste)
By this time I was feeling sick. I'd been feeling sick that morning, but now my throat was really sore. I was so mad that my body was trying to ruin my vacation! Stupid body. But Jenni came to my rescuse with a whole bottle of vitamin C. She pumped me full of the stuff and saved the day. (10 pts to super Jenni and her variety of pills.)
So what do writers do when they get together? Uh, we read our stuff! After lots of food and chatting, we gathered our laptops and settled into the couches to read a little from our various projects.
That's me, Kasie, and her sister Stephanie. Notice how cool Kasie and I are with our Macbooks. (5 pts to Natalie and Kasie for having awesome laptops. Also, 5 pts to Michelle for having a black Macbook of coolness not featured in photo.)
There's Kasie and Jenni. Notice how Kasie tends to get around...totally kidding, Kasie! (Kinda.) (5 pts for social butterfly-ness)
You know what's cool about hearing writers read their own stuff? Personalities come out SO MUCH. Watching Jenni read in particular was a riot! (5 pts for almost making me pee my pants.) I really "got" her stuff hearing her read it aloud. It had so much of her personality in it! It was the same for everyone—I so very much enjoyed it.
Also, Jenn read from her WIP Insomnia, which has an incredibly cool premise that I'm salivating over. Wildly jealous I didn't come up with it. (5 pts for making me wildly jealous.)
And do you know what else I enjoyed? Having Michelle read her adult novel to all us YA writers. Oh man, I was laughing so hard when she made at least half of us blush with her saucy scenes. Teehee. (10 pts to the Glam for having the guts to do it.)
After yet more talking, a lot of Code Red, and a ton of candy, including these:
Kasie brought a pack of Junior Mints for everyone. She apparently has a thing for them. I've never been a fan—it's the mint. They even put a few packs in the freezer. I guess they're good frozen?
I was beat by 1 AM and had to sleep, but there were some who stayed up all the way to 3:30AM. I know, because I got up to pee then and there were lights still on. Thus ends day one...
POA TOTAL:
Natalie: 40
Michelle: 55
Candice: 30
Jenni: 35
Kasie: 20
Jenn: 20
Reed's Drive-In: 50 pts.
Whoa, Michelle, congrats! You've passed up Reed's Drive-In! Don't worry, ladies, I'm sure you'll make up points next post—I mean, you did go to a waterfall, where apparently I "missed out." I'll still retell the stories though.
Once me and the Glam made it to this seriously cool cabin, we knew we were in for a good time. I mean, sure, we were in the Middle of Nowhere, Utah, but check out this nowhere:
That would be the view from the cabin porch at sunset. Holy crap, right? It's up on a hill, and there's this old mill and pond and desert perfection as far as you can see. (All pictures by the Glam [10 pts to Michelle for serious skills].)
The place was decked out! (har har, I'm a dork.) Not only a great view, but I even got my own room. Kitchen, spacious living room, and several bathrooms made it feel like home.Candice's family has owned this cabin for a long time, and they hold family reunions there every year. She and her parents were nice enough to stay a little longer to host our retreat. (20pts to Candice for giving us the hook up.)
When Michelle and I arrived, only Candice and Jenni were there. But that worked out great because I hadn't officially met either of them. Jenni also brought her adorable daughter Bailey and her younger sister Casey. We had several hours to chat before Kasie and Jenn arrived. And chat we did—like teen girls discussing which Jonas Brother they like best, except about books and writing. (Okay, maybe there were a few mentions of Miley Cyrus, Disney princesses, and Zac Effron. But I swear I never heard a thing about a Jonas Brother.)
Here's what I learned about Candice:• She has the most gorgeous smile.
• She treats everyone like family; I felt so welcome, like I'd known her a long time and hadn't just met.
• She and Michelle totally "get" each other's writing style.
• She has incredible taste in beverages—she tried my beloved Diet Mountain Dew Code Red and liked it. (10 pts to Candice for knowing where it's at.)
Here's what I learned about Jenni:• She has a great sense of humor.
• Her husband and six children have red hair! So JEALOUS. (10 pts to Jenni for making so many babies with the coolest hair color in the world.)
• She is so chill about publishing—really believes it will happen when it happens. She treasures each moment of the journey.
• She's directed plays. Professionally.
Jenni was in charge of dinner that night, and she made a tater tot casserole. If you don't know what this is, you really need to. It's pretty much the epitome of Mormon comfort food. You take chicken and broccoli (or whatever veggies you like), mix em up with spices and cream of chicken soup, add LOTS of cheese, and put a layer of tater tots on top. What comes out of the oven is one glorious sheet of cheesy, potatoey goodness. (10 pts to Jenni for making broccoli too good to be healthy.)
And then the party really got going, because Kasie and Jenn showed up. Kasie brought along her daughter Hannah and her sister Stephanie as well. There was a lot of laughing after that as we ate food and got them settled.
Here's what you have to know about Kasie:• She has seemingly endless energy.
• She's really good at playing the life of the party.
• She's pretty much gorgeous.
• She uses her computer so much that she just got the keyboard replaced—and freaked out becuase the store had her baby for THREE DAYS. (10 pts to Kasie for being as obsessive as me about my computer.)
Here's what I learned about Jenn:• She has for real red, gorgeously curly hair that makes me simmer with envy.
• She's writing a boy MC like me! (10 pts for writing awesome boys!)
• She lives near me and the Glam—freaking small world.
• She also has excellent taste in beverages. Code Red for the win! (5 pts for good taste)
By this time I was feeling sick. I'd been feeling sick that morning, but now my throat was really sore. I was so mad that my body was trying to ruin my vacation! Stupid body. But Jenni came to my rescuse with a whole bottle of vitamin C. She pumped me full of the stuff and saved the day. (10 pts to super Jenni and her variety of pills.)
So what do writers do when they get together? Uh, we read our stuff! After lots of food and chatting, we gathered our laptops and settled into the couches to read a little from our various projects.
That's me, Kasie, and her sister Stephanie. Notice how cool Kasie and I are with our Macbooks. (5 pts to Natalie and Kasie for having awesome laptops. Also, 5 pts to Michelle for having a black Macbook of coolness not featured in photo.)
There's Kasie and Jenni. Notice how Kasie tends to get around...totally kidding, Kasie! (Kinda.) (5 pts for social butterfly-ness)You know what's cool about hearing writers read their own stuff? Personalities come out SO MUCH. Watching Jenni read in particular was a riot! (5 pts for almost making me pee my pants.) I really "got" her stuff hearing her read it aloud. It had so much of her personality in it! It was the same for everyone—I so very much enjoyed it.
Also, Jenn read from her WIP Insomnia, which has an incredibly cool premise that I'm salivating over. Wildly jealous I didn't come up with it. (5 pts for making me wildly jealous.)
And do you know what else I enjoyed? Having Michelle read her adult novel to all us YA writers. Oh man, I was laughing so hard when she made at least half of us blush with her saucy scenes. Teehee. (10 pts to the Glam for having the guts to do it.)
After yet more talking, a lot of Code Red, and a ton of candy, including these:
Kasie brought a pack of Junior Mints for everyone. She apparently has a thing for them. I've never been a fan—it's the mint. They even put a few packs in the freezer. I guess they're good frozen?I was beat by 1 AM and had to sleep, but there were some who stayed up all the way to 3:30AM. I know, because I got up to pee then and there were lights still on. Thus ends day one...
POA TOTAL:
Natalie: 40
Michelle: 55
Candice: 30
Jenni: 35
Kasie: 20
Jenn: 20
Reed's Drive-In: 50 pts.
Whoa, Michelle, congrats! You've passed up Reed's Drive-In! Don't worry, ladies, I'm sure you'll make up points next post—I mean, you did go to a waterfall, where apparently I "missed out." I'll still retell the stories though.
Monday, July 20, 2009
The Drive Down
I'm going to do a few posts on the writers' retreat I went on this weekend, since it was too much fun to fit in one post. Today: the drive to the cabin. (Yes, this will be long and filled with pictures.)
On Friday I picked up Michelle (aka Lady Glamis) for the drive down to southern Utah. If you didn't know, I'm lucky enough to live about 10 minutes from the Glam. We hang out rather frequently. About 20 miles into the drive, she realized she didn't have her camera battery...so we went back and started again. Yeah, 10 pts for Michelle remembering before we got 100 miles in.
Note: I will be awarding Points of Awesome (POA) in every post. Writer with most points at the end wins. (I don't know what they win, they just do.)
We planned to stop for lunch in Nephi, Utah, because after that there's nothing (and I mean nothing) for about 50 miles. I got off at the first exit, since I'd never techincally stopped in Nephi and had no clue where the food in said town would be. We passed just one place—Reed's Drive-In—and nothing else. That was weird; I was sure there'd be more choices.
We decided to stop there, try our luck. I mean, it didn't look like much, but it did have several cars in front of it. Including this one:
How can a place with a brand new CAMARO in front of it be bad? I about fainted and restrained myself from touching it.
20 pts to Natalie for stumbling on the best Drive-In ever.
I took some pretty ones too, but I don't have photoshop to make it look as cool as hers:
I also tried to take pictures of all the freaky crickets that kept jumping out of Michelle's way. Dude, I've never seen so many just hanging out! I'm guessing there were over 100 just by my car.
I was kind of freaking out, but I was more worried about the cars and trucks barreling by us. It's not like there was much room to pull off the road. I didn't want to get hit, but I tried to keep a positive outlook in the semi-dangerous situation. (5 pts to Natalie for staying positive in the face of crickets, heat, and semi-trucks.)
By the way, that's Red Velvet, my car. She's white on the outside and red on the inside just like the cake. I know, super hawt—I even have a "Senior Friends" sticker on the windsheild.
Once I convinced Michelle to get back in the car, we continued driving through the middle of nowhere, occasionally passing through towns so small they didn't even have gas stations.
And then it hit. My Curse.
Did you know I was cursed? Well, I am. I don't like to talk about it. It's one of the worst curses out there—the Curse of the Speed Limit Avengers. Yes, it's true. I attract slow drivers like Robert Pattinson attracts teen girls. They flock to me, finding me even in places where the road should be WIDE OPEN.
Example:
That's right, people, I can find a "traffic jam" in the middle of nowhere. 10 pts for Natalie.
Yeah, we're going 40 MPH in a 65MPH zone! The Curse lives! (Also, yes, that GIANT dial on the right hand side is my fuel meter. It still makes me laugh. Red Velvet is classy like that, making sure you don't miss how much gas you have.)
After suffering from the Curse for about an hour, we finally got to a straight away long enough to pass the Speed Limit Avengers. Don't worry, I made up for lost time. We made it to Candice's family cabin in one piece, where we met some fabulous friends. More on that tomorrow...
UPDATE: POA TOTAL
Michelle: 30 pts.
Natalie: 35 pts.
Reed's Drive-In: 50 pts.
* Honestly, I think Michelle would agree that Reed's Drive-In deserved to be winning at this point. It was that good.
On Friday I picked up Michelle (aka Lady Glamis) for the drive down to southern Utah. If you didn't know, I'm lucky enough to live about 10 minutes from the Glam. We hang out rather frequently. About 20 miles into the drive, she realized she didn't have her camera battery...so we went back and started again. Yeah, 10 pts for Michelle remembering before we got 100 miles in.
Note: I will be awarding Points of Awesome (POA) in every post. Writer with most points at the end wins. (I don't know what they win, they just do.)
We planned to stop for lunch in Nephi, Utah, because after that there's nothing (and I mean nothing) for about 50 miles. I got off at the first exit, since I'd never techincally stopped in Nephi and had no clue where the food in said town would be. We passed just one place—Reed's Drive-In—and nothing else. That was weird; I was sure there'd be more choices.
We decided to stop there, try our luck. I mean, it didn't look like much, but it did have several cars in front of it. Including this one:
How can a place with a brand new CAMARO in front of it be bad? I about fainted and restrained myself from touching it.So we went in, and they had quite the awesome menu! Navajo tacos, gyros, burgers, a little ice cream parlor. I had a feeling we might have found a gem. I ordered a pastrami burger and Michelle went for the gyro. They brought it to our table and my jaw dropped. It looked incredible, like a commercial for pastrami burgers. It was so fresh the swiss cheese was still bubbling a little! Michelle's gyro actually had lamb on it. So now you know—you can get lamb in Nephi, Utah (pop 5k).
I was so in love with the toasted bun, the perfect fries, the mound of grilled pastrami and pickles that I'm going back asap. So what if it's 30-40 mins away? I love you Reed's Drive-in!
I was so in love with the toasted bun, the perfect fries, the mound of grilled pastrami and pickles that I'm going back asap. So what if it's 30-40 mins away? I love you Reed's Drive-in!
20 pts to Natalie for stumbling on the best Drive-In ever.After the yummiest fast food meal of my life (at least in the past, oh, five years I can remember), we headed back out to the freeway. Turns out two exits down were all the fast food chains—thank goodness I got off too early and found awesome. (Okay, I just have to give Reed's 50 pts, even if it's not a writer.)
If you don't know anything about Utah, I need to fill you in on a few things:
1. Northern Utah is fairly populated in the valleys.
2. Southern Utah is vast and dotted with itty bitty towns and nothing in between.
3. When California falls into the ocean, there's plenty of room for survivors here. No worries, Kasie informed me it's no hotter than Fresno.
So Michelle and I are driving through a whole lot of "nothing." Except it's rather pretty nothing if you happen to enjoy the desert thing. The colors are just beautiful...as long as you're in an air conditioned car and not marooned out there in the heat.
I'm driving along, concentrating on getting us there in one piece, when Michelle exclaims, "Okay, you have to stop! I can't take it anymore! I have to take pictures!" (15 pts to Michelle for being crazy enough about photography to make me stop.)
I kind of saw this coming. She had been going on about how pretty everything was and how she'd love to take a picture of that rock, and oh, look at those clouds! We were going to be early anyway, so I pulled over in the middle of nowhere and she pulled out her camera:
And she took some pretty pictures (5 pts for pretty pictures):
If you don't know anything about Utah, I need to fill you in on a few things:
1. Northern Utah is fairly populated in the valleys.
2. Southern Utah is vast and dotted with itty bitty towns and nothing in between.
3. When California falls into the ocean, there's plenty of room for survivors here. No worries, Kasie informed me it's no hotter than Fresno.
So Michelle and I are driving through a whole lot of "nothing." Except it's rather pretty nothing if you happen to enjoy the desert thing. The colors are just beautiful...as long as you're in an air conditioned car and not marooned out there in the heat.
I'm driving along, concentrating on getting us there in one piece, when Michelle exclaims, "Okay, you have to stop! I can't take it anymore! I have to take pictures!" (15 pts to Michelle for being crazy enough about photography to make me stop.)
I kind of saw this coming. She had been going on about how pretty everything was and how she'd love to take a picture of that rock, and oh, look at those clouds! We were going to be early anyway, so I pulled over in the middle of nowhere and she pulled out her camera:
And she took some pretty pictures (5 pts for pretty pictures):
I took some pretty ones too, but I don't have photoshop to make it look as cool as hers:
I also tried to take pictures of all the freaky crickets that kept jumping out of Michelle's way. Dude, I've never seen so many just hanging out! I'm guessing there were over 100 just by my car.
I was kind of freaking out, but I was more worried about the cars and trucks barreling by us. It's not like there was much room to pull off the road. I didn't want to get hit, but I tried to keep a positive outlook in the semi-dangerous situation. (5 pts to Natalie for staying positive in the face of crickets, heat, and semi-trucks.)
By the way, that's Red Velvet, my car. She's white on the outside and red on the inside just like the cake. I know, super hawt—I even have a "Senior Friends" sticker on the windsheild. Once I convinced Michelle to get back in the car, we continued driving through the middle of nowhere, occasionally passing through towns so small they didn't even have gas stations.
And then it hit. My Curse.
Did you know I was cursed? Well, I am. I don't like to talk about it. It's one of the worst curses out there—the Curse of the Speed Limit Avengers. Yes, it's true. I attract slow drivers like Robert Pattinson attracts teen girls. They flock to me, finding me even in places where the road should be WIDE OPEN.
Example:
That's right, people, I can find a "traffic jam" in the middle of nowhere. 10 pts for Natalie.
Yeah, we're going 40 MPH in a 65MPH zone! The Curse lives! (Also, yes, that GIANT dial on the right hand side is my fuel meter. It still makes me laugh. Red Velvet is classy like that, making sure you don't miss how much gas you have.)After suffering from the Curse for about an hour, we finally got to a straight away long enough to pass the Speed Limit Avengers. Don't worry, I made up for lost time. We made it to Candice's family cabin in one piece, where we met some fabulous friends. More on that tomorrow...
UPDATE: POA TOTAL
Michelle: 30 pts.
Natalie: 35 pts.
Reed's Drive-In: 50 pts.
* Honestly, I think Michelle would agree that Reed's Drive-In deserved to be winning at this point. It was that good.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Freaky Fun
Hey! I'm back! Man, the trip was a blast and I have tons to share, but for right now I'm gonna take a long bath and pass out in bed. I stayed up way too late talking with some fabulously cool friends. I love meeting writers from online! It's like getting together with old friends, except you're meeting for the first time. Totally sucks out the introduction jitters.
I don't have pictures loaded or anything, but I thought it might be fun to put up a little piece I wrote while there. We played a game where we got a random person, place, and thing. Then we had 20 minutes to write. I know, such a geeky writer thing to do, and super awesome. It was a blast hearing what we all came up with.
Freak Show
Jason waited impatiently for the crowd to make its way into the tent. It was always the same kind of people at the freak show. The gangly, black-clad guys with stringy hair. The tattooed women who smoked like their goal was to die tomorrow. The kind of people who had to pay to see people weirder than themselves.
“Hey, baby cakes,” an old woman with purple hair crooned. “Watcha doin’ after this?” She reeked of lavendar mixed with formaldehyde.
“Going home with my girlfriend, sorry.” Jason was used to these kind of comments, even if it was creepy to get hit on by geezers at nineteen.
“Aw, such a shame. We could have had fun.” She took a swig from her flask and tripped her way up the bleachers.
He let out a sigh. Running security for the freak show sucked, but he liked to see Lavinia do her act. Besides, the extra money wasn’t bad. He knew he was really the “freak” in this bunch, what with the whole looking attractive thing. His tight white shirt covered a rack of muscle it was hard to ignore. He’d worked hard for it, and he’d continue working hard for it in the main show’s acrobatic event.
Once the crowd was settled, Jason stood at the edge of the ring and waited for the show to begin. The tent lights turned a putrid green as the Freak Master stepped on stage. The audience clapped, the air heavy in anticipation of the wackos to come.
“Ladies and gentlemen! Prepared to be amazed by the dark wonders of nature! The sick, demented things that roam this earth! You will be mystified! Terrified!...” The Freak Master went on much longer than Jason cared to listen. Lavinia was first, and he couldn’t wait to see her.
Finally, the Freak Master finished his speech. “First, we will show you the beautiful, the deadly Lavinia!”
The lights turned pink. Small pieces of confetti trickled from above. A song pierced the air—so beautiful the audience went silent just so they could hear the full majesty of the melody.
There she was, Lavinia. His girlfriend. Her black hair draped down her porcelain skin. She wore nothing more than a pink swimsuit. She was beauty incarnate. A siren.
I don't have pictures loaded or anything, but I thought it might be fun to put up a little piece I wrote while there. We played a game where we got a random person, place, and thing. Then we had 20 minutes to write. I know, such a geeky writer thing to do, and super awesome. It was a blast hearing what we all came up with.
Freak Show
Jason waited impatiently for the crowd to make its way into the tent. It was always the same kind of people at the freak show. The gangly, black-clad guys with stringy hair. The tattooed women who smoked like their goal was to die tomorrow. The kind of people who had to pay to see people weirder than themselves.
“Hey, baby cakes,” an old woman with purple hair crooned. “Watcha doin’ after this?” She reeked of lavendar mixed with formaldehyde.
“Going home with my girlfriend, sorry.” Jason was used to these kind of comments, even if it was creepy to get hit on by geezers at nineteen.
“Aw, such a shame. We could have had fun.” She took a swig from her flask and tripped her way up the bleachers.
He let out a sigh. Running security for the freak show sucked, but he liked to see Lavinia do her act. Besides, the extra money wasn’t bad. He knew he was really the “freak” in this bunch, what with the whole looking attractive thing. His tight white shirt covered a rack of muscle it was hard to ignore. He’d worked hard for it, and he’d continue working hard for it in the main show’s acrobatic event.
Once the crowd was settled, Jason stood at the edge of the ring and waited for the show to begin. The tent lights turned a putrid green as the Freak Master stepped on stage. The audience clapped, the air heavy in anticipation of the wackos to come.
“Ladies and gentlemen! Prepared to be amazed by the dark wonders of nature! The sick, demented things that roam this earth! You will be mystified! Terrified!...” The Freak Master went on much longer than Jason cared to listen. Lavinia was first, and he couldn’t wait to see her.
Finally, the Freak Master finished his speech. “First, we will show you the beautiful, the deadly Lavinia!”
The lights turned pink. Small pieces of confetti trickled from above. A song pierced the air—so beautiful the audience went silent just so they could hear the full majesty of the melody.
There she was, Lavinia. His girlfriend. Her black hair draped down her porcelain skin. She wore nothing more than a pink swimsuit. She was beauty incarnate. A siren.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Road Trip!
So I'm going on vacation. By myself. For three days.
I KNOW. Crazy awesome. I haven't been on a vacation by myself since before I was married, meaning about five years. Okay, I haven't even been on a vacation WITH people since Disney World with my family in June 2005. It's been soooo long, and I'm so excited to get just the tiniest taste of "freedom" for a few days.
Not that I don't love being a mom, because I do. My kids are freaking adorable and sweet and growing faster than I can comprehend. But I need a little break. I just...I'm so tired! Do you know what vacation is when you have two kids three and under? It's sleeping in and not changing a single diaper for three whole glorious days. It's peace and quiet. It's talking to adults. I have to stop...I'm going to pass out. It sounds too good to be true.
But what makes the whole thing that much better is the fact that I'm going with writing friends! I'm sure you don't understand how long it's been since I've had real friends with common interests. I've never had many—I don't really know why (cuz I'm awesome...and so not weird). So the fact that I get to hang out with them is super cool.
Unfortunately, I won't be able to get a sketch up on Saturday, but I should have lots of drawings to post when I get back. I'm bringing all my art stuff with me. Wee. Hope you all have a lovely weekend.
I KNOW. Crazy awesome. I haven't been on a vacation by myself since before I was married, meaning about five years. Okay, I haven't even been on a vacation WITH people since Disney World with my family in June 2005. It's been soooo long, and I'm so excited to get just the tiniest taste of "freedom" for a few days.
Not that I don't love being a mom, because I do. My kids are freaking adorable and sweet and growing faster than I can comprehend. But I need a little break. I just...I'm so tired! Do you know what vacation is when you have two kids three and under? It's sleeping in and not changing a single diaper for three whole glorious days. It's peace and quiet. It's talking to adults. I have to stop...I'm going to pass out. It sounds too good to be true.
But what makes the whole thing that much better is the fact that I'm going with writing friends! I'm sure you don't understand how long it's been since I've had real friends with common interests. I've never had many—I don't really know why (cuz I'm awesome...and so not weird). So the fact that I get to hang out with them is super cool.
Unfortunately, I won't be able to get a sketch up on Saturday, but I should have lots of drawings to post when I get back. I'm bringing all my art stuff with me. Wee. Hope you all have a lovely weekend.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Squealing May Occur
I have a few things to talk about, but let's get to the important stuff first. I found Tosh! If you don't know, Tosh(iro) Ito is the MC of Relax, I'm a Ninja. He's smart and funny and expertly trained in ninjutsu. He's also into Dungeons & Dragons—it is an excellent way to practice hensojutsu (disguises).
Anyway, I found Haruma Miura last night. He's an actor in Japan, and pretty much how I envision Tosh. *Squeals* *Dances like a fool* I didn't think I'd ever find a good resemblance. There's just not many Japanese American teen actors out there, which is a crying shame.
Next bit of news: it's officially been two weeks of "vacation" for me! *Squeals* I can now write—wait, I mean edit. No...I can't write...I'm not writing anymore books this year. (I haven't thought once about giving up on that already. Okay, maybe I have thought about it precisely 33 times. Gulp.)
It's time to outline all my edits on Hammered (not to mention start thinking seriously of a new title). I'm really looking forward to reworking parts of it. Overall, the story is great—I just introduced a couple unnecessary characters. Sigh. I'm really good at that. I think cutting characters is the hardest thing I've had to do. As a writer, you put so much into their personalities...it feels personal to take them out. But sometimes it's for the best because they distract from the important people.
On that vein of not writing, I'm in big trouble. Last night, while trying to sleep, Tosh started talking to me again. He gave me the first line of the possible ninja sequal. *Squeals* I grabbed the notebook on my nightstand and wrote it in the dark, then tried to sleep as the scene played out in my head. It's pretty dang good...and I can't write it yet. Someday, Tosh, someday.
I get way too many ideas when I'm trying to sleep. Do any of you have that problem? My brain never turns off. And even if I manage to sleep, I have wild dreams. Like last night, I dreamt I was on The Food Network participating in a cooking challenge. I had to make two dishes—one with eggs and one with strip steak. And I must have been in the mood for Asian food, because I was planning to make eggs rolls and yakisoba. Mmm.
Let's see, do I have anything else to squeal about right now? Oh yeah! I'm going on a mini writers' retreat on Friday with Lady Glam and Kasie, to name a few. Three days. No kids. My laptop. *Squeals*
Anyway, I found Haruma Miura last night. He's an actor in Japan, and pretty much how I envision Tosh. *Squeals* *Dances like a fool* I didn't think I'd ever find a good resemblance. There's just not many Japanese American teen actors out there, which is a crying shame.
Next bit of news: it's officially been two weeks of "vacation" for me! *Squeals* I can now write—wait, I mean edit. No...I can't write...I'm not writing anymore books this year. (I haven't thought once about giving up on that already. Okay, maybe I have thought about it precisely 33 times. Gulp.)
It's time to outline all my edits on Hammered (not to mention start thinking seriously of a new title). I'm really looking forward to reworking parts of it. Overall, the story is great—I just introduced a couple unnecessary characters. Sigh. I'm really good at that. I think cutting characters is the hardest thing I've had to do. As a writer, you put so much into their personalities...it feels personal to take them out. But sometimes it's for the best because they distract from the important people.
On that vein of not writing, I'm in big trouble. Last night, while trying to sleep, Tosh started talking to me again. He gave me the first line of the possible ninja sequal. *Squeals* I grabbed the notebook on my nightstand and wrote it in the dark, then tried to sleep as the scene played out in my head. It's pretty dang good...and I can't write it yet. Someday, Tosh, someday.
I get way too many ideas when I'm trying to sleep. Do any of you have that problem? My brain never turns off. And even if I manage to sleep, I have wild dreams. Like last night, I dreamt I was on The Food Network participating in a cooking challenge. I had to make two dishes—one with eggs and one with strip steak. And I must have been in the mood for Asian food, because I was planning to make eggs rolls and yakisoba. Mmm.
Let's see, do I have anything else to squeal about right now? Oh yeah! I'm going on a mini writers' retreat on Friday with Lady Glam and Kasie, to name a few. Three days. No kids. My laptop. *Squeals*
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Lunch With Two of My Favorite People
That's right, go ahead and be wildly jealous. I spent my afternoon with my very first online writer buddies: Kiersten and Renee. This is the second time all three of us have been able to get together. The first time was last August, and it was just as much fun this time around. Maybe even more fun because I don't have many close friends, and these two are some of my closest and I never get to see them for reals.After a nice lunch (minus one seriously slow server), we headed to Barnes & Noble. Uh, where else would three writers go? While there, we proceeded to get weird stares while shamelessly taking pictures of ourselves in the YA section where our book would be if, ya know, we ever got published:
Renee would be next to Suzanne Collins and a little book called The Hunger Games. Uh, lucky! Talk about prime real estate.
Kiersten would be pretty close to Scott Westerfield and The Uglies series, which, well, ain't too bad either.
And me? Well, I'd get to be next to Kiersten when she gets there. I think it rocks that we'd be shelf buddies.Then we had to take a picture next to the coveted Co-op Table of Destiny:
If you notice, I have two books in my hand (If I Stay and Eyes Like Stars)...like I can leave that place without buying something. I also forced Renee to buy The Hunger Games (Ren, I'll refund you if you don't like it, but I'm pretty sure I'll be keeping my money.).Let's do this again next year at the latest, okay?
Monday, July 13, 2009
A Challenge. Place Your Bets Now.
I need to stop writing. You know I have a new book idea percolating. I haven't written a word on it, and I know I shouldn't because I have a ton of editing to do on other projects. So I've decided to give myself a goal only someone as crazy as me would need in the first place:
I'm not going to write another book this year.
Yeah, you read that right. I have written 3 books this year. That's enough, right? I'm not intending to write another one. We all know my willpower may wane—there's still half a year left. Feel free to place your bets. I'll give an awesome prize to the person who gets closest to the day I hypothetically crack.
Note: That doesn't include notes and research. I always allow myself to do that, even on vacation.
There is just one massive, hypothetical exception: If, by chance, I land an agent, get a multi-book deal, and have a sequel to write, then I won't be waiting until 2010 to get started. (And if that happens, I'll give a prize to the person closest to the day that happens.) But that's it. Otherwise I'll be editing my existing projects until they shine brighter than a diamond encrusted unicorn.
I'm not going to write another book this year.
Yeah, you read that right. I have written 3 books this year. That's enough, right? I'm not intending to write another one. We all know my willpower may wane—there's still half a year left. Feel free to place your bets. I'll give an awesome prize to the person who gets closest to the day I hypothetically crack.
Note: That doesn't include notes and research. I always allow myself to do that, even on vacation.
There is just one massive, hypothetical exception: If, by chance, I land an agent, get a multi-book deal, and have a sequel to write, then I won't be waiting until 2010 to get started. (And if that happens, I'll give a prize to the person closest to the day that happens.) But that's it. Otherwise I'll be editing my existing projects until they shine brighter than a diamond encrusted unicorn.
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Saturday Sketch 5.0
Last week I drew Adair, and this week you get his brother Gil Rinshek (my MC) and his special metagun Nero. Gil isn't necessarily apathetic, he just doesn't care about what doesn't affect him. At least what he thinks doesn't affect him, like Adair's lengthy speeches on, well, free speech. As long as he can forge metawares, Gil's content. Of course, he wouldn't mind if Lizelle, the barber's daughter, would notice how much he likes her. But he's totally fine watching her cut his hair, too. It sucks that he has to leave his whole life behind just to make sure Adair doesn't get himself killed.
In other new project news, I've found the perfect working title for it! (Emphasis on working title.) So far it's just been Gil and Adair's story. Or sometimes I call it Metaforge. But those don't really work with the entirety of the novel.
At it's core, this book is going to be about democracy and the revolutions it takes to get "the voice of the people." Is it worth the death? Is it worth the war and years of turmoil? Is it worth the opportunity for dictators to swoop in?
Of course we all want to say yes, but democracy ain't no perfect system either. It's a complex maze of compromise and political parties with long, often greedy, agendas. No system is perfect, and I often wonder if I really comprehend the sacrifice revolutionaries gave. They put down comfort and took a stand, believing that it would be worth it one day. Many lost their lives for an idea. Could I do such a thing? I'm not sure, and neither is Gil. Can't wait for us to find out together.
So with all this in mind, I am nicknaming my book after the ultimate symbol of democracy/compromise:
Spork
What? Not what you were expecting? Sporks protray exactly what democracy is—opinions from opposing sides smashed into one beautifully inefficient utensil. Not quite sturdy enough to stab anything like a fork—unless you're trying to use it as a spoon, then you'll stab your tongue just fine. So instead of one side being completely happy, no one's happy at all. Just, begrudgingly content that they have something to eat with. Better than getting food all over your fingers...I think.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Book Commentary: Don't Judge a Girl by Her Cover
Note: This is the 3rd in the Gallagher Girls series by Ally Carter. The first being I'd Tell You I Love You, But Then I'd Have To Kill You, and the second being Cross My Heart and Hope to Spy.Short Summary: After a botched kidnapping attempt at a political convention, Cammie is left wondering why her friend Macey was the target and not the possible future president's son. Time to put those spy skills to good use and find out.
I've really enjoyed this series so far. While at times it can be light and fun, it's also packed with suspense and mystery and bittersweetness. They're really quick reads, about 250 pages. Also, it's super duper clean. So for those tween girls looking for a good transition between middle grade and young adult, I highly recommend these.
In the third book, Carter stays true to her conversational, humorous style, which I love, but this time around things did start to get a bit repetitive. Not the important stuff, but the details. Yes, I know they speak 14 languages. Yes, their favorite teacher Mr. Solomon is freaking hot. Yes, Cammie is brilliant. The asides restating those facts over and over did get a bit wearisome now that I've spent three books in this world.
That said, I really like where Carter is taking the story now. There's something bigger out there for the sequels—more threat to Cammie (the MC) instead of just random spy happenings. And what's really cool about this series is that the sequels are better than the first book. That doesn't happen often. It's building so well—it doesn't feel like all the best stuff was used up in book one. I can't wait to see what Carter has in store for Cammie next round.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
The Jitters
I'm a week into my self-imposed writing vacation. I have the jitters. Do you know what I mean? Maybe not. Basically I'm itching to get back to it. Week one of vacation is always like withdrawal for me. I have been relaxing, but I am soooo not good at being unproductive.
I might have to pull out my sewing machine and make a quilt so I don't feel useless. Yes, along with my ninja skills, cybernetic enhancements, and uber WoW Shaman healing talents, I quilt. (I'm so the definition of well-rounded.) I haven't in a while though. Mostly because I write a lot, but also because it's pricey and I'm poor. Unfortunately, food > fabric.
Anyway...what was I talking about? Oh yeah, the jitters. I'm kind of dying to write. Gil and Adair are jabbering away in my head, begging to get on virtual paper. What's worse is that I have the opening scene in my head. I don't know how long I can refrain. If that first paragraph starts speaking to me, I may be doomed. I just have to hold out until next Wednesday...
Sigh, no. I can't start another book. See this addictive pattern? It's terrible. I have books to edit. Specifically, Hammered (I know, it still needs a better title too). That book is pretty dang cool, and it really deserves time and attention.
Me: Turns to Gil and Adair. "You two are just going to have to wait your turn. Sorry."
Adair: How can you say that? Our journey is of the utmost importance! This is the people's freedom we're talking about!
Gil: I'm good, Natalie, take your time.
Adair: Punches Gil's shoulder. "He's kidding."
Gil: No, I'm not. I'm completely fine putting off getting captured by Duke Marceau, having our metaguns taken hostage, and trying to escape with all my limbs intact.
Adair: Shakes his head. "Don't be such a baby. We'll figure it out, right, Natalie?"
Me: Um, yes?
Gil: Great, she doesn't even know. We're dead.
Adair: Just another adventure, brother, another adventure.
Gil: Uh, no, that's what stupid people say to justify their stupid decisions.
Adair: Busts up laughing. Rambles on about sacrifice and positive outlook.
Okay, see my problem? Can someone tell them to shut up? They won't listen to me. That being said, they're just going to have to bicker among themselves for a while. I have a pack of cyborgs and clones to deal with. Next week, of course.
I might have to pull out my sewing machine and make a quilt so I don't feel useless. Yes, along with my ninja skills, cybernetic enhancements, and uber WoW Shaman healing talents, I quilt. (I'm so the definition of well-rounded.) I haven't in a while though. Mostly because I write a lot, but also because it's pricey and I'm poor. Unfortunately, food > fabric.
Anyway...what was I talking about? Oh yeah, the jitters. I'm kind of dying to write. Gil and Adair are jabbering away in my head, begging to get on virtual paper. What's worse is that I have the opening scene in my head. I don't know how long I can refrain. If that first paragraph starts speaking to me, I may be doomed. I just have to hold out until next Wednesday...
Sigh, no. I can't start another book. See this addictive pattern? It's terrible. I have books to edit. Specifically, Hammered (I know, it still needs a better title too). That book is pretty dang cool, and it really deserves time and attention.
Me: Turns to Gil and Adair. "You two are just going to have to wait your turn. Sorry."
Adair: How can you say that? Our journey is of the utmost importance! This is the people's freedom we're talking about!
Gil: I'm good, Natalie, take your time.
Adair: Punches Gil's shoulder. "He's kidding."
Gil: No, I'm not. I'm completely fine putting off getting captured by Duke Marceau, having our metaguns taken hostage, and trying to escape with all my limbs intact.
Adair: Shakes his head. "Don't be such a baby. We'll figure it out, right, Natalie?"
Me: Um, yes?
Gil: Great, she doesn't even know. We're dead.
Adair: Just another adventure, brother, another adventure.
Gil: Uh, no, that's what stupid people say to justify their stupid decisions.
Adair: Busts up laughing. Rambles on about sacrifice and positive outlook.
Okay, see my problem? Can someone tell them to shut up? They won't listen to me. That being said, they're just going to have to bicker among themselves for a while. I have a pack of cyborgs and clones to deal with. Next week, of course.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Nicknames
Maybe it's because my name is 3 whole syllables long, but I've always had this fascination with nicknames (and by fascination I might mean desire to have a freaking cool one). A lot of my characters end up having nicknames. And if not, they have really short names. But we're not talking about characters/books today. I'm going to talk about the few nicknames I ended up with.
Nat: Oh man, did I hate being called Nat when I was younger. Mostly because kids would be like, "Hey, you're a bug! Ya know, like a Gnat! Har har!" (Yes, their insulting skills were extremely sub par.)
Now I don't mind it, but it's still not my favorite, what with the memories it conjures. The funny thing though—if I had to pick a gender neutral pen name (since I'm that girl writing a boy MC), I'd probably end up with Nat Whipple. Oh, cruel irony.
Bubby: My Auntie Lori called me Bubby, not anyone else. It made me feel special that she had a pet name just for me. When we moved from Fremont I didn't see much of her, but I always remembered that. Now that she's gone (lost her 2 years ago to cancer), it kinda tugs at my heart if I hear someone else call their kid that.
Wolverine: I was, well, not a very nice kid at school sometimes. But kids were very not nice to me, so I swear most of it was self defense. There were these boys who started calling me Wolverine due to my long, sharp nails (which I wasn't afraid to use in a fight, mind you). They may have been trying to insult me/discourage me from fighting back, but I was very proud of that nickname. He was my favorite X-men, after all.
Talie: For some reason, I really didn't like my name growing up. Natalie? So long! So...I don't know. I was a weird kid (shush, I know you're not surprised). Starting in about 8th grade or so, I went by Talie. Most people called me that in high school. I went back to Natalie in college, so it makes me laugh now when I run into someone from high school and they call me Talie. Always brings me back "to the days."
That's about it on my nicknames. Feel free to share yours in the comments. I'm kinda dying to know if anyone had a really awesome nickname I can spend the whole day being jealous over.
Nat: Oh man, did I hate being called Nat when I was younger. Mostly because kids would be like, "Hey, you're a bug! Ya know, like a Gnat! Har har!" (Yes, their insulting skills were extremely sub par.)
Now I don't mind it, but it's still not my favorite, what with the memories it conjures. The funny thing though—if I had to pick a gender neutral pen name (since I'm that girl writing a boy MC), I'd probably end up with Nat Whipple. Oh, cruel irony.
Bubby: My Auntie Lori called me Bubby, not anyone else. It made me feel special that she had a pet name just for me. When we moved from Fremont I didn't see much of her, but I always remembered that. Now that she's gone (lost her 2 years ago to cancer), it kinda tugs at my heart if I hear someone else call their kid that.
Wolverine: I was, well, not a very nice kid at school sometimes. But kids were very not nice to me, so I swear most of it was self defense. There were these boys who started calling me Wolverine due to my long, sharp nails (which I wasn't afraid to use in a fight, mind you). They may have been trying to insult me/discourage me from fighting back, but I was very proud of that nickname. He was my favorite X-men, after all.
Talie: For some reason, I really didn't like my name growing up. Natalie? So long! So...I don't know. I was a weird kid (shush, I know you're not surprised). Starting in about 8th grade or so, I went by Talie. Most people called me that in high school. I went back to Natalie in college, so it makes me laugh now when I run into someone from high school and they call me Talie. Always brings me back "to the days."
That's about it on my nicknames. Feel free to share yours in the comments. I'm kinda dying to know if anyone had a really awesome nickname I can spend the whole day being jealous over.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
The Worst Draft Ever
Thanks to everyone yesterday who joined in the great discussion on yesterday's post! I had so much fun "chatting" with everyone and learning more about what people think about the "rules." Also, thanks for keeping it civilized and smart. I was a little afraid people might go all troll on me.
Today I wanted to talk about first drafts, since that's the one thing that I didn't make very clear yesterday. For the record, when I'm talking about looking past the "rules," that all goes for the first draft. I am in no way saying that you should write a piece, deem it perfect, and expect agents to think it's amazing. That, my friends, is the fastest way to fall on your butt ever.
I don't mean to make myself sound like a know-it-all, but I think I can safely say I know a thing or two about first drafts. I do have 10 of them, after all. You could call me a textbook first-draft-a-holic. I get a sick high off jumping into a new world and figuring it out on the page. It's a rush. I prefer it to any other form of entertainment. Which is probably why I'm swimming in words-to-be-edited now.
In getting to know all my writing buddies, I've learned that everyone has their own first drafting style. Some whip it out in a whirlwind of creativity rivaling Handel writing his masterpiece, The Messiah. Others take a much steadier pace, taking years to write that first draft.
Whether you are the tortoise or the hare or something in between (let's say...a badger, for kicks), I really don't think it matters. What matters is getting the words on the page—making progress. That's why the "rules" tick me off. For many a writer, they shut down progress. I know it's happened to me. The pressure to be perfect, to make everyone happy, to produce a book with very few flaws. Well, that's impossible, trust me on that one.
You guys know I fall into that kind of "hippy" mentality when it comes to writing. I like to let things come out organically. I put my inner editor in time out and write the book before he can tell me how much it sucks (Yes, my inner editor is male. I don't know why, but he is.). I figure I'm going to have to revise a ton anyway, why try and make every word right the first time? How do I even know what's right the first time? Better to get it done fast and then put in the editing time I have to do anyway.
I'm going to let you in on a secret—I had a little crisis earilier this year. With all the editing I've done on Relax, I'm a Ninja, I started to think that my process was flawed. Maybe all these revisions could have been avoided if I was that slower writer, if I was the kind of writer who "edited as they went," if I'd agonized over every word during the creation process.
So when I started my next project, Hammered, I decided to try the whole "well thought out" first drafts thing. I wrote outlines. I reread my chapters and edited things so it'd be clean when I was done with the draft. I tortured myself about every plot point. Was I doing the right thing? Was I taking the book in the best direction? Were these characters likable enough? Am I using too many tags? Not enough? And on and on.
Well, I finished the book in a longer amount of time for me (almost four months). I will say that I think the writing is cleaner than past drafts, but it didn't prevent me from having to make significant structural changes to the book. I still have to delete a entire character, add a new sequence to replace said character, and revise the back half of the book accordingly. I'm not sure the "prettier writing" makes up for the grumpiest months of my life, especially since Hammered is still facing major revisions.
I'm not saying the "think it through" process is bad. Please, please, don't read it that way. I'm saying it didn't work for me. I'm an organic writer; I need to accept that. Trying it the other way sucked out all the fun. And above everything, I enjoy writing. I can't sacrifice the joy it brings me just to have a few less adverbs and tags to edit out.
What I've learned through all of this? First drafts suck, get over it. No matter how well you write, no matter how long, no matter how organizational you are—you WILL be revising, and most likely a lot. So stressing about the "rules" on the first go around is kind of a futile, self-destructive endeavor.
I personally think it's much more productive to accept that you might write the crappiest first draft on the planet. You know what? That's okay! That's what editing is for—that's what those, gag, "rules" are for. Once you get your work finished for the first time, that's when a new kind of magic begins.
After editing a few of my books into the ground (Void and the ninjas), I stand back in awe of how far they've come since the first draft. But they could never be what they are now if I didn't allow myself to "write crap" first. That's my real beef with the "rules." They often get in the way of our personal creativity, of our ideas, of our self-esteem. All three of which you'll need to get that first draft written.
Today I wanted to talk about first drafts, since that's the one thing that I didn't make very clear yesterday. For the record, when I'm talking about looking past the "rules," that all goes for the first draft. I am in no way saying that you should write a piece, deem it perfect, and expect agents to think it's amazing. That, my friends, is the fastest way to fall on your butt ever.
I don't mean to make myself sound like a know-it-all, but I think I can safely say I know a thing or two about first drafts. I do have 10 of them, after all. You could call me a textbook first-draft-a-holic. I get a sick high off jumping into a new world and figuring it out on the page. It's a rush. I prefer it to any other form of entertainment. Which is probably why I'm swimming in words-to-be-edited now.
In getting to know all my writing buddies, I've learned that everyone has their own first drafting style. Some whip it out in a whirlwind of creativity rivaling Handel writing his masterpiece, The Messiah. Others take a much steadier pace, taking years to write that first draft.
Whether you are the tortoise or the hare or something in between (let's say...a badger, for kicks), I really don't think it matters. What matters is getting the words on the page—making progress. That's why the "rules" tick me off. For many a writer, they shut down progress. I know it's happened to me. The pressure to be perfect, to make everyone happy, to produce a book with very few flaws. Well, that's impossible, trust me on that one.
You guys know I fall into that kind of "hippy" mentality when it comes to writing. I like to let things come out organically. I put my inner editor in time out and write the book before he can tell me how much it sucks (Yes, my inner editor is male. I don't know why, but he is.). I figure I'm going to have to revise a ton anyway, why try and make every word right the first time? How do I even know what's right the first time? Better to get it done fast and then put in the editing time I have to do anyway.
I'm going to let you in on a secret—I had a little crisis earilier this year. With all the editing I've done on Relax, I'm a Ninja, I started to think that my process was flawed. Maybe all these revisions could have been avoided if I was that slower writer, if I was the kind of writer who "edited as they went," if I'd agonized over every word during the creation process.
So when I started my next project, Hammered, I decided to try the whole "well thought out" first drafts thing. I wrote outlines. I reread my chapters and edited things so it'd be clean when I was done with the draft. I tortured myself about every plot point. Was I doing the right thing? Was I taking the book in the best direction? Were these characters likable enough? Am I using too many tags? Not enough? And on and on.
Well, I finished the book in a longer amount of time for me (almost four months). I will say that I think the writing is cleaner than past drafts, but it didn't prevent me from having to make significant structural changes to the book. I still have to delete a entire character, add a new sequence to replace said character, and revise the back half of the book accordingly. I'm not sure the "prettier writing" makes up for the grumpiest months of my life, especially since Hammered is still facing major revisions.
I'm not saying the "think it through" process is bad. Please, please, don't read it that way. I'm saying it didn't work for me. I'm an organic writer; I need to accept that. Trying it the other way sucked out all the fun. And above everything, I enjoy writing. I can't sacrifice the joy it brings me just to have a few less adverbs and tags to edit out.
What I've learned through all of this? First drafts suck, get over it. No matter how well you write, no matter how long, no matter how organizational you are—you WILL be revising, and most likely a lot. So stressing about the "rules" on the first go around is kind of a futile, self-destructive endeavor.
I personally think it's much more productive to accept that you might write the crappiest first draft on the planet. You know what? That's okay! That's what editing is for—that's what those, gag, "rules" are for. Once you get your work finished for the first time, that's when a new kind of magic begins.
After editing a few of my books into the ground (Void and the ninjas), I stand back in awe of how far they've come since the first draft. But they could never be what they are now if I didn't allow myself to "write crap" first. That's my real beef with the "rules." They often get in the way of our personal creativity, of our ideas, of our self-esteem. All three of which you'll need to get that first draft written.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Quit It With The "Rules" Thing!
There are a lot of things I love about the online writing community. I would have never gotten this far without the friends I've met along the way. Learning to write a query, finding the right agents for my work, meeting great crit partners—all things that have made my writing better and my attempts at publication a bit easier.
But as great as some things are, there are other aspects of the online gig that are, well, annoying. Michelle talked about one of my personal pet peeves today—The "Rules." (See how I'm not even validating that word by putting it in quotes?)
(What? You sense a rant coming on? Oh baby, yeah.)
I'm not talking punctuation and grammar; that's just good writing etiquette. All written languages require that kind of organization. Every writer should know where commas go and when to use a semicolon. I'm talking more about the "this is how you should write your book" stuff.
Dude, there are no rules! You really can write your book however you want. Sure, some people may not like it, but you can always change that if you want. Guidelines, people, guidelines. All this don't-use-adjectives-and don't-write-a-flashback junk is nothing more than good suggestions. No one says you have to follow them. And I will tell you right now that keeping with the "rules" won't get you any closer to publication. Let's pull a few examples:
Twilight: We all know this book has a horribly bad rep in the writing community for being wordy and indulgent. People are outraged because it breaks pretty much every so-called "rule." And yet—bestseller times infinity. Get over it; those vamps were a brilliant idea.
The Hunger Games: Crazy good book, guys. You know what? Collins uses a HUGE flashback right near the beginning, like, a 6 page flashback that many an online crit group would point out as a faux pas. Guess what? It totally works. And the world of this book is so well imagined I'm jealous I didn't think of it.
Writers tend to moan and groan about this kind of stuff. Example: "ARG! Why did that book get published when this writer can't even follow the "rules"? This isn't fair! I never use passive voice! Why can't the publishers see that?"
You're not going to like this, but I'm going to let you in on the secret: It's not a writer's skill that gets them through the door—it's their ideas.
It's the truth. Okay, I'm guessing about now I have a few skeptics saying something like, "But the blogging agents/editors say this! And they tell us to do that! They say there are rules!"
I'm not going to argue with the undeniable fact that a "clean" book has a better shot in the slush. Update: Emphasis added—skill is serious icing and sprinkles on the idea cake. BUT. Say there was a "clean" book that was utterly boring and a "messy" book with a killer idea? Hate to break it to you, but the agent will go for the idea over the "rules" every time. Why? You can make writing better—you can't fabricate creativity.
I'm obviously not working on revisions for an agent because he thought my writing was perfect. He liked my ideas and my characters. He saw my potential. He decided I was something he wanted to invest time in. I've learned loads of great writing advice in the process, but when it comes down to it my ideas are the big deal.
Guidelines are important, don't get me wrong. They help facilitate the reader's understanding of our work. I really wouldn't recommend writing your masterpiece using three languages, no punctuation, and mathmatical equations to express emotions.
But don't let yourself get stuck in the box of "rules." Especially when rough drafting—talk about a creativity murderer.
Think about the great scientists and artists. Copernicus, Picasso, Galileo, Michaelangelo, Newton, Monet, Einstein, Pollock, Tesla, etc. No, they didn't throw out the "rules"—they allowed themselves to think past them to bigger ideas. Becuase it's not really the rules that matter, it's the driving force behind them. You want to improve your writing? Start with a great idea, not proper use of adverbs. Get your great idea on paper first, then go about making it genius.
But as great as some things are, there are other aspects of the online gig that are, well, annoying. Michelle talked about one of my personal pet peeves today—The "Rules." (See how I'm not even validating that word by putting it in quotes?)
(What? You sense a rant coming on? Oh baby, yeah.)
I'm not talking punctuation and grammar; that's just good writing etiquette. All written languages require that kind of organization. Every writer should know where commas go and when to use a semicolon. I'm talking more about the "this is how you should write your book" stuff.
Dude, there are no rules! You really can write your book however you want. Sure, some people may not like it, but you can always change that if you want. Guidelines, people, guidelines. All this don't-use-adjectives-and don't-write-a-flashback junk is nothing more than good suggestions. No one says you have to follow them. And I will tell you right now that keeping with the "rules" won't get you any closer to publication. Let's pull a few examples:
Twilight: We all know this book has a horribly bad rep in the writing community for being wordy and indulgent. People are outraged because it breaks pretty much every so-called "rule." And yet—bestseller times infinity. Get over it; those vamps were a brilliant idea.
The Hunger Games: Crazy good book, guys. You know what? Collins uses a HUGE flashback right near the beginning, like, a 6 page flashback that many an online crit group would point out as a faux pas. Guess what? It totally works. And the world of this book is so well imagined I'm jealous I didn't think of it.
Writers tend to moan and groan about this kind of stuff. Example: "ARG! Why did that book get published when this writer can't even follow the "rules"? This isn't fair! I never use passive voice! Why can't the publishers see that?"
You're not going to like this, but I'm going to let you in on the secret: It's not a writer's skill that gets them through the door—it's their ideas.
It's the truth. Okay, I'm guessing about now I have a few skeptics saying something like, "But the blogging agents/editors say this! And they tell us to do that! They say there are rules!"
I'm not going to argue with the undeniable fact that a "clean" book has a better shot in the slush. Update: Emphasis added—skill is serious icing and sprinkles on the idea cake. BUT. Say there was a "clean" book that was utterly boring and a "messy" book with a killer idea? Hate to break it to you, but the agent will go for the idea over the "rules" every time. Why? You can make writing better—you can't fabricate creativity.
I'm obviously not working on revisions for an agent because he thought my writing was perfect. He liked my ideas and my characters. He saw my potential. He decided I was something he wanted to invest time in. I've learned loads of great writing advice in the process, but when it comes down to it my ideas are the big deal.
Guidelines are important, don't get me wrong. They help facilitate the reader's understanding of our work. I really wouldn't recommend writing your masterpiece using three languages, no punctuation, and mathmatical equations to express emotions.
But don't let yourself get stuck in the box of "rules." Especially when rough drafting—talk about a creativity murderer.
Think about the great scientists and artists. Copernicus, Picasso, Galileo, Michaelangelo, Newton, Monet, Einstein, Pollock, Tesla, etc. No, they didn't throw out the "rules"—they allowed themselves to think past them to bigger ideas. Becuase it's not really the rules that matter, it's the driving force behind them. You want to improve your writing? Start with a great idea, not proper use of adverbs. Get your great idea on paper first, then go about making it genius.
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