It's been a whirlwind five days, but Sara is on a plane home and here I am realizing how much I enjoyed her visit. It was so nice to be face-to-face after years of instant messaging. And we got to hang out with so many other writer friends! Online friendships becoming real is the coolest thing.
My head is spinning with stuff—the work I have waiting, the cleaning I don't want to do, how I'm going to get on without all my friends close by—so I'm afraid any recaps will have to wait. Maybe they won't come at all. Sometimes I wonder if talking so much about my "exciting" life makes others feel left out and sad. I'd hate to do that; I know what it's like to feel like you're on the outside.
In a similar thread, I totally quit Facebook last week! I gotta admit I'm loving it. I felt bad most of the time because I rarely got on, and when I did I just ended up feeling awful about myself because I didn't have any exciting news to share.
I'll be honest, sometimes social networking or whatever makes me feel so...lame. Sometimes it feels like a bigger version of "keeping up with the Joneses," as if my life is less because I don't have insert-whatever-thing-here.
I hate feeling like that. I hate that I fall for it when I know it's not true. So I got rid of Facebook, and I've been contemplating much on internet interaction in general.
Not to say I think social networking is bad (Hi, my dearest friends are a result of it!), I'm just saying there's a line. I'm saying I think I've been flirting with that line too much lately and need to rein myself in. I'm not ashamed to admit that—I think most of us go through it.
These last few days were a good reminder of just how important real life is, how much I actually like my real life.
How you feel about Facebook is essentially how I feel about Twitter. Fortunately it's not something I have to reign in (yet), but I give a firm "no" to any and every other social networking medium out there.
ReplyDeleteI mean "rein" in :-P
ReplyDeleteI have a Facebook because I use it for school, actually. Quick chat = homework help.
ReplyDeleteNow Twitter....
I hardly use facebook. I should probably use it more (oh, there's that guilt), but I just don't have to time. What a good idea to get off it. =) It was good to see you this weekend and meet Sara!
ReplyDeleteYou know I know how you're feeling. I go through this every few weeks. :)
ReplyDeleteWell I like my real life too. Especially when it means having an awesome lunch with a few crazy-talented writers. :)
Re: social networking. I think it's all about finding what you're naturally inclined to. I like blogging. It probably keeps a good deal of madness out of my WIPs. I'm on facebook, but that's not professional.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm not on Twitter, because it's not my thing. I might have to try it out some day, since I write YA and my characters might like to use it. But other than that, no desire whatsoever.
Real life is fun though :)
Yep. I've gone through those same things. That's why I'm rarely on facebook and took the summer off from blogging. My family and my real life needed me fully involved in it.
ReplyDeleteLots of people feel that way! I enjoy it...but that's just me. I say life is too short to spend a moment being miserable or feeling bad about your accomplishments...you know?!?
ReplyDeleteLots of people feel that way! I enjoy it...but that's just me. I say life is too short to spend a moment being miserable or feeling bad about your accomplishments...you know?!?
ReplyDeleteThis is an interesting perspective. And good for you, if FB wasn't making you happier to be brave enough to quit it! I'm glad you had such a great weekend. :)
ReplyDeleteI feel like this issue of balance (real life vs. online life, what's necessary, what's healthy) has been coming up a lot lately. In a good way! I know I've definitely been contemplating where I spend my time/energy, and I realize that I'm not allocating it that well. So there's some shifting going on...
ReplyDeleteHopefully we'll both see positive results sooner rather than later!
The only reason I like FB is because it helps me keep in touch with good friends from high school, college and grad school that have dispersed all over the country. It's especially hard when two of my best friends live in California and the other in Houston. But, I draw the line at tweeting. It may be an excellent way for social networking. But I have my blog and I have FB, that's all that I can handle at this time.
ReplyDeleteAmen, sista! Real life is SO much better. Especially when awesome friends are involved :D
ReplyDeleteI don't go on Facebook very often. My husband calls it Facebrag because like you said, sometimes it's just about keeping up with the Joneses. And Twitter usually just overwhelms me. Blogging is enough for me for now.
ReplyDeleteIt's so wonderful to meet people in solidspace - especially when you've been talking to them online for quite a while. I'm glad you had such a great time.
ReplyDeleteI think the social networking thing is very personal. I don't get on with Facebook because I don't show a single face to the world, but sometimes it's the only way to keep up with friends.
Being partly housebound (I can't get out in the evenings or manage long meetings) talking to friends in thoughtspace matters a lot to me. I meet wonderful people here - present company included!
Two years ago, I wondered about whether to start blogging.
ReplyDelete"Bound to be a time suck," I thought.
"Yes," I thought back, in one of those dual-brain mindwarp things that happen when I'm working on a dialogue scene, "it is."
Fortunately, I failed to heed my own advice, and have since rubbed nibs with many a worthy soul, yourself included — also the goodly Hog, whose sentiments I echo.
Twitter, I like too, because it's frivolous, flighty, and more than a little ridiculous.
But Facebook — hmmm, yes: never quite got to grips with that one either.
Can't think of anyone better to not spend time on Facebook with at the moment — unless Ernest Borgnine isn't on there either. Knowing my luck, he's probably dead.
I think that's just awesome, Natalie. I loathe Facebook, and it often leaves me feeling left out. I am considering quitting, except there are a few people I'd like to be able to occasionally check in with, so I haven't yet. Otherwise, I mostly ignore it.
ReplyDeleteThanks for all the comments! Like many of you said, I think that "line" is totally personal. I'm so glad no one saw this as a social networking bash—because obviously I like me some social networking!
ReplyDeleteBut it is a constant balance to me, one I have to review regularly.
I know what you mean! I'm constantly having to remind myself I don't have to do everything on the internet! There's so much advice out there to do this, that, and the other in order to establish a presence. It's important to remember that it's not everything-- real life is pretty awesome compared to Facebook!
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean. I had to quit Facebook for a couple months to reset priorities... but I'm loath to delete it entirely because my generation doesn't know how to use email... but it was seriously eating my life. Now Blogger has taken over that responsibility. I think I see a new opportunity for Lent.
ReplyDelete