All that spring cleaning I've mentioned in the previous post? Yeah, it's getting done and it's wonderful but hard. I feel like I've been learning a lot about what I do and don't want in my life in the last couple weeks, and I'm seeing more and more that social media is something I really *don't* want around on a large scale.
I have to admit to myself that it's not fun for me anymore. It's not helpful in my career like it used to be. It stresses me out when I get online and see all the STUFF. Just so much stuff. Clutter. I can't handle clutter right now.
I'm not the writer I used to be. Honestly, I don't know how I feel about writing and publishing and a big part of me is considering ending my pursuit of it all. I'm in a really negative place about it all. I have been trying not to feel like that, but it's not stopping. Every time I think about anything writing…I just don't want to deal with it. I get anxious and I feel the panic attacks coming on.
I don't know what it all means. I don't want to go into all the details of my ugly feelings in public. All I know is I need to step back in a big way.
So that's what I'm doing. In all aspects of my writing life. I have no contracts, which means it's a good time for me to take a break and see if I really want to keep doing this. I will of course keep my current event schedule, but that's about it.
See you when I see you.